http://boards.weddingbee.com/ Weddingbee Boards: Forum: Interfaith - Recent Topics en Tue, 14 Feb 2012 04:00:06 +0000 http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/where-do-you-start-when-planning-a-wedding-1#post-2869277 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 22:17:30 +0000 sonnysprincess 2869277@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>I've lost my magic wand and need some help in where to start the whole wedding planning process. Any help is appreciated! <img src="http://boards.weddingbee.com/my-plugins/tinymce/jscripts/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/img/smiley-smile.gif" alt="Smile" title="Smile" /></p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/spinoff-interfaith-couples-children-and-religion-whats-the-plan#post-3194230 Mon, 06 Feb 2012 13:25:25 +0000 Ms Hedgehog 3194230@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>I was reading <em><a href="profile/caitmarae">CaitMarae</a></em>'s <a href="http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/atheistagnostic-bees-children-038-religion-what%E2%80%99s-your-plan">pos<em>t</em></a><a href="http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/atheistagnostic-bees-children-038-religion-what%E2%80%99s-your-plan"><em></em></a>, (which was super interesting BTW) and it got me thinking. Every time somebody finds out Mr. Hedgie and I are from different religions and neither with plans to convert the topic quickly turns to how we are going to raise our children. I feel like we are lucky in that our religions are so closely intertwined. I am Christian and he is Jewish. So, for us it was much easier to come up with a game plan.</p> <p>Our child will be raised under BOTH religions. For me, celebrating the High Holy days just gives me a way to get closer to my religion by following even more is Jesus' footsteps. I mean, he celebrated these, so why shouldn't I? We will have a bris, a baby dedication (I am baptist and we don't baptise babies.) They will go to church and, if we can find a synagogue we like, we will go there too. The church we are looking at joining even has a messianic service once a month which is super cool! (Messianic Judaism... for those who don't know is Judaism but with Jesus!) They will still be bar/bat mitva'd if they want or baptized if they choose. We will celebrate all holidays from both religions and teach them about both as best we can. Sure, it may be confusing at times but in the end, just as I had to make the concious decision to become a Christian, they will have to make he concious decision to follow the faith they believe. And while I obviously would love for them to be Christian, I also want them to truely believe. And if they decide they don't and they want to be Jewish then that is their choice and I will love them and be proud of them all the same because they made the best decision for themselves they could make.</p> <p>(To make things slightly less confusing I have considered looking for a messianic temple but Mr. Hedgie isn't completely gung ho on that. He would much rather we go to church.)</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p><strong>So, What is your guys' plan? Will you raise them under both? Just one? Or none? Or do you have another plan? I want to see how other people are handling such a difficult and sometimes touchy topic.</strong></p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/priest-and-imam-what-do-you-think-are-reasonable-fees#post-3200645 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 18:50:21 +0000 rubia12 3200645@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>Hi there hive - here's my question: what is a reasonable fee for our officiants?</p> <p>We are having an interfaith ceremony at a country club and both an imam and a priest will be officiating. The priest told me that he usually gets $1000 for ceremonies like ours, and we should pay the imam the same to be fair.</p> <p>I definitely didn't budget $2000 for officiant fees so I'm kinda stressing out. Has anyone done a ceremony like our and how much did you pay the officiants? Does this sound like a reasonable rate to you or is it more than average? I know when my sister got married at our local Catholic church she paid the priest $200 after paying another $200 in fees to the church itself.</p> <p>Thanks!</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/catholic-muslim-ceremony#post-2932701 Sun, 04 Dec 2011 13:29:44 +0000 smashkins 2932701@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>Hi Bees,</p> <p>I am Catholic, while the husband to be is Muslim. We have decided that neither of us are converting and will have an inter-faith ceremony. We have also discussed what we will do for our future children, so that has all been discussed and agreed upon. We are having the ceremony and reception at an Historic Hotel. I'm trying to find an Imam to perform a blessing and then a priest or officiant to finish the ceremony essentially, or combine the two somehow.</p> <p>Has anyone had a Muslim/Catholic wedding or been to one?? I'm having a hard time figuring out how I can equally incorporate major elements of both religions as it is important to us. Any advice??</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/advice-for-first-meeting-with-priest#post-3134718 Tue, 24 Jan 2012 15:26:43 +0000 MissSamurai 3134718@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>My Finance and I are not religious at all but my parents are uncomfortable with anyone but a priest/person of worship (I'm not sure how to refer to them) marry us. It doesn't really bother us either way so we decided it wouldn't hurt anything to go by their wishes.&nbsp; We attend a Protestant Church every sunday with Fiance's best friend's family(they are like family to him), and even though we don't believe in God we feel we walk away each weekend with new things to think about.&nbsp;</p> <p>We recieved assurance that the preist we were interested in would be willing to accomdate our desire to have a more secular wedding, which were told it was no problem. We set up a meeting with that priest and he sent us an email for things he would like to discuss with us. Most of the stuff on his list was not a big deal but I was caught off-gaurd when he also mentioned he wanted to discuss sexual purity with us. Needless to say we both "did not wait until marriage."</p> <p>A little more information: My entire family is Catholic and I was raised Catholic as well but I don't consider myself a practicing Catholic. While we both have differing views with some of the beliefs of the Catholic Church my Fiance and I wouldn't mind being married there if it made my parents happy, but my Church does not allow interfaith marriages (exception being between Christians), my Fiance was raised Buddhist, though he does not consider himself a practicing buddhist.</p> <p>Sex is something that FI and I talk about willingly but we both find it a bit uncomfortable to discuss it with the officiant. Is it likely the officiant would turn us down just because of this? Or is this more of a thing where he is asking just to suggest that we shouldn't? We both aren't planning to lie but is there anyway to handle this topic gracefully when it comes up? Does anyone have any experience with this?</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/help-interfaith-ceremony#post-2860656 Tue, 15 Nov 2011 03:40:18 +0000 abbie017 2860656@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>Background:&nbsp; I am a practicing Catholic; I was raised Catholic, and I follow my faith.&nbsp; My fiance is Jewish; he has not attended services since I met him, but he maintains some of the traditions and celebrates the High Holy Days (Yom Kippur, Roshashana).&nbsp;</p> <p>We are doing a civil ceremony in our reception venue, not in a Church or temple, and it was a big concession for me (my dream has always, always been to get married in my hometown church with the priest I grew up with).&nbsp; We wanted to incorporate bits of both our faiths to make it a ceremony unique to us.&nbsp; My problem is, there are very few Catholic traditions that I can incorporate (Bible readings is basically it), and he wants to smash the glass, have a barucha (prayer), and a chuppah.&nbsp; I was okay with it all up until the chuppah.&nbsp; There are so many traditions he can incorporate, and there is really very little I can come up with that could be used.&nbsp; Does anyone have any ideas?&nbsp;</p> <p>Thanks for any help!</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/our-awesome-personal-ceremony#post-848671 Wed, 31 Mar 2010 13:15:16 +0000 ashleyleah 848671@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>My husband's&nbsp;parents are Buddhist, my Dad is Jewish/athiest, my Mom and my Stepmom are both nonpracticing Catholic believers.&nbsp; My best friend and I who are only children have adopted each other as sisters.&nbsp; She is Hindu.&nbsp; My husband's and my other best friends are Muslim, Jewish, Christian, Buddhist and Hindu.&nbsp; My husband and I, we celebrate love through all faiths.</p> <p>For our ceremony, his mentor, and older Buddhist friend, and my mentor, and older Jewish friend were our officiants.&nbsp; In addition to their officiating, 5 others stood up and spoke for us about important aspects of marriage.&nbsp;</p> <p>Friendship:&nbsp; The basis of the Hindu marriage - from the Sapta Padi.&nbsp; Speech from my "sister."</p> <p>Partnership: The basis of the Islamic marriage. Speech from my best friend.</p> <p>Personal growth: An important aspect of Christian life and relationships. Speech from my husband's best friend.</p> <p>Kindness/Compassion: Basis for Buddhist relationships and life. Speech from my husband's sister.</p> <p>Attraction/Love: Cornerstone of Jewish marriage, represented in Old Testament. Speech from my best friend.</p> <p>Our ceremony was truly awesome. Everyone involved was special to us and having them stand up for us like that and support our marriage meant everything. In this way, our wedding also included on a personal level all of our guests through the traditions that are important to them (and are thus important to us).&nbsp; Each year we celebrate the Buddha's Birthday, Passover, Diwali, Christmas, and Ramadan, among other holidays, with our friends and family.&nbsp; We were so proud of our multicultural ceremony, and all of our guests felt special to be part of a celebration of love between cultures.</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/questions-on-catholicnon-catholic-marriage-prep#post-3129367 Mon, 23 Jan 2012 14:46:02 +0000 MissMaryMc 3129367@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>Hey Bees!</p> <p>i'm cross posting with the Catholic board. I hope you don't mind.</p> <p>I'm writing an article for a local Catholic paper about marrying a non-Catholic in a Catholic ceremony.</p> <p>I offered to do it because I can speak from my own perspective, but I also wondered if any of you guys had questions that I should also address.</p> <p>So...any Catholic ladies marrying non-Catholics/or non-Catholics marrying Catholics... what questions or concerns did you have before starting your Catholic marriage prep?</p> <p>Thanks!</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/the-holidays-1#post-2995098 Wed, 21 Dec 2011 06:20:05 +0000 ignatiangal 2995098@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>My MIL is at it again.</p> <p>This year we hosted Thanksgiving, we had 11 people, all the families and it was awesome. Now it is time for Christmas and honestly I am starting to dread it and I used to LOVE Christmas.</p> <p>A little background, DH and his mom are Jewish, his stepdad is Catholic so MIL and FIL do celebrate Christmas as well as Hanukkah as do I and DH which is fine. They are also retired where as my family aren't and they don't have the 26th off this year. The option of compromise given to MILandFIL was the 22nd and the 26th and new years eve and day. OR the morning of Christmas Day and we leave at 2pm to go to my family and either new years eve or new years day.&nbsp;</p> <p>Come to find out she is once again pulling the pouting and tempertantrums and "all or nothing" crap this year, I am ready to say fine - nothing and walk away DH doesnt seem to be willing to stand up to her so I have a feeling if we set foot in her house on Christmas day we won't be "allowed" to leave. Last year we were supposed to split Thanksgiving and have dinner with them and then do desert with my family who ate later then them so it was no problem and she threw a fit and got her way. I don't want Christmas to be like that.</p> <p>I now know why my mother hated Christmas for years.&nbsp;</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/agnosticatheist-christian-how-to-make-a-marriage-work#post-2136619 Tue, 10 May 2011 06:23:28 +0000 iheartnerds 2136619@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>Just wondering, for those bees who are in a relationship where one is Christian (any denomination, or really any religion for that matter) and the other is agnostic or atheist, how do you, or plan to, make your marriage work? There are so many compromises to be made when you don't share the same beliefs, so I wonder what everyone else is doing to have a successful marriage/relationship. How do you deal with things like attending church or, more importantly, raising children? I'd love to hear any responses!</p>