http://boards.weddingbee.com/ Weddingbee Boards Tag: family en Mon, 13 Feb 2012 23:25:28 +0000 http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/help-bridal-shower-stress-and-bridal-drama-what-would-you-do#post-3225031 Mon, 13 Feb 2012 14:35:45 +0000 ChefDori 3225031@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p><a href="#post-3214956">@happilyeverafter32412:</a>&nbsp; Oh sweetie I feel for you. I agree with all PP, just try to do what you can and maybe your BM's can pitch in, it you have some. As far as the bachelorette party goes maybe a nice eveing at home or a hotel) with pizza, wine, cake and friends would be nice, budget friendly, and low key or a nice day at the spa to relax with your loved ones.&nbsp;</p> <p>My FI is upset that I have to make my own bridal shower cake (I am a pastry chef, so I don't mind doing it) on top of flying from OR to AZ to attend my shower. All of my family and friends are there so it made the most sense. Anyways, I too will be chipping in to pay for my shower since my MOH is a mom of three and only her husband works. Good thing I have 4 sisters and my mom to also help out. We too are paying for our wedidng on our own.&nbsp;</p> <p>Good luck and if you need anything feel free to message me.&nbsp;</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/awkward-family-situation#post-3222799 Mon, 13 Feb 2012 07:20:53 +0000 Rachel631 3222799@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>I realise that your wedding has almost certainly come and gone, but I had a quick suggestion:</p> <p>"The way the Methodist church does it is to come to the front, get your bread, dip it in the cup and go back to your seat."</p> <p>In the Methodist-esque tradition I was raised in, servers handed around small shot glasses of (fake) wine and pieces of bread. You held these in your hands and prayed whilst everyone was served. Then, after everyone, including the preacher (who doesn't eat/drink ahead of you) has both elements in their hands, you pray together, eat the bread at the same time, and drink the (fake) wine at the same time. This might solve the problem, because people can then just subtly ignore the bread and wine as it is passed around, and it won't be obvious who has taken them and who hasn't.</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/would-i-be-out-of-line-to-put-an-age-limit-for-my-guests-1#post-3222155 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 23:31:50 +0000 jess.vic 3222155@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>Personally I am not having any kids except for my fiance's nephew who's the ringbearere there. So it's your day do what you want. Pluss do you really want a bunch of little kids running around touching the cake crying telign their parents they're bored. As a kid the only fun wedding I went to was one where they had a pinata all other weddings were boring. Good luck on your decision. </p> <p>&nbsp;</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/help-bridal-shower-stress-and-bridal-drama-what-would-you-do#post-3221173 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 18:50:43 +0000 quishi 3221173@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>You're not crazy and it's not bridezilla-ish of you. Unfortunately a lot of ppl don't realize how *unhelpful* they really are. I never got a bridal shower, not sure if I'm getting a bachellorette party, my mom isnt helping, my MOH is MIA, and my FI suddenly has developed the worst case of ADD I have ever witnessed! Lol... Oh and did I mention I don't have a wedding planner, my family is delusional about the budget *still*, and I'm also planning a honeymoon... Just try to realize that it is OK to just do what you want, and not what you feel you have to do. If you want a shower then try to delegate as much as possible, and if that's not working out then make it a smaller event. It's not worth stressing yourself out over. If a few light but honest conversations don't work, then, my advise, just drop the expectations and move on. That's what I had to learn to do the hard way. To be honest, it feels kind of good to not expect things from anyone, that way when they are actually a little considerate it is a pleasant surprise, instead of a let down because they didn't do as much as you thought they would... *Chin up* *HUGS*</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/would-i-be-out-of-line-to-put-an-age-limit-for-my-guests-1#post-3221073 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 18:26:20 +0000 quishi 3221073@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>It's your wedding and honestly if you would rather leave out a bunch of little kids that won't even remember the day and will probably just end up crying or making the parents leave early anyway, then that is totally fine in my book. We decided early on that the time and place where we wanted to have our wedding was not apt for children. I was very specific on the invites. I put each individuals name on the outer envelope and on the inside invitation. I even put: "We have reserved __ spaces for you." and filled in the blank with the exact number of guests invited to the wedding. Granted in spanish it doesn't sound so blunt, but maybe you can tweak the wording. We even made a point of specifying kind of off handedly to the one couple we were most worried about that kids were not allowed. Even with all that, the wife still had the audacity to ask if she could bring her 6 yr. old. We politely replied that she couldn't as we had decided that children would not be in attendance and that this applied to all guests. And that we would still really love to share this special day with her and her husband as they are family and we really care about them. I'm hoping they will make it, after all she asked after she had rsvp'ed "yes". If they don't then they're very selfish in my opinion. Babysitters don't cost a fortune. Just be clear about "the rule", if 5 is the cut-off, and stick to it, no exceptions. I don't think you should have to sacrifice anything in your wedding to invite people you don't want there, even if they are cute little kids and their parents might get offended. You should make it clear from the start, no wishy-washy answers when they ask, and guilt them a bit by saying how much their presence means to you. Hopefully they'll be considerate and not make a big deal out of it. Good luck!</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/worried-about-my-grandmother#post-3220595 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 16:31:44 +0000 TwinABee 3220595@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p><a href="#post-3220185">@Jacqui90:</a>&nbsp;&nbsp;You're welcome!</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/fiancee-guestlist-drama-tips-wanted#post-3220250 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 14:58:11 +0000 AnastasiaM 3220250@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>You're right, you need to prepare for 100% attendance (rare, but it happens!). &nbsp;Can you cut off the line at grandparents, aunts &amp; uncles, first cousins &amp; spouses and ONLY invite people he is close to other than that? &nbsp;200 from his side alone when you have budgeted for about 150 people is way too many!</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/fiancee-guestlist-drama-tips-wanted#post-3220209 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 14:45:48 +0000 rebwana 3220209@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p>I just thought of something else- Long holiday weekend equals family trip to Disney! If you invite extended family, there's a really good chance they'd come, since they have an extra time off work, and it can be a vacation.</p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/fiancee-guestlist-drama-tips-wanted#post-3220203 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 14:42:46 +0000 rebwana 3220203@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p><div>I copied this from Peggy Post's <em>Wedding Etiquette</em>- (FMIL wants to invite 20 family members who "won't attend but "need" an invite"...HER aunts, whom my FI doesn't even know):</div><br /> <div>&nbsp;</div><br /> <div>"Sending invitations to out-of-town guests who can't possibly attend:</div><br /> <div>In most cases, invitations are not sent to those friends and acquantances who cannot possibly attend the celebration. Since an invitation to a wedding carries an obligation to send a gift, inviting someone who can't possibly attend makes it look as if you are inviting those friends in order to receive a gift. Also, people with whom your only communication for the past several years has been holiday cards are generally not included on the invitation list either.. Any of the above could receive a wedding annoucement instead, which carries no gift obligation whatsoever."</div> </p> http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/worried-about-my-grandmother#post-3220185 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 14:37:00 +0000 Jacqui90 3220185@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ <p><a href="#post-3219292">@TwinABee:</a>&nbsp; thanks so much, I will consider doing that :) hadn't thought of that, thank you</p>