Weddingbee Boards Topic: Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness

Weddingbee Boards Topic: Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness http://boards.weddingbee.com/ Weddingbee Boards Topic: Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness en Tue, 14 Feb 2012 13:43:20 +0000 cbgg on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-467588 Fri, 13 Nov 2009 00:04:55 +0000 cbgg 467588@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ I couldn't agree more.  Feminist socioeconmic weirdness is a great way to describe it.   This weird sensation or wanting to feel like a family with one name but feeling like you lose your individual identity and being angry that it's only you that has to sacrifice and that he doesn't have to deal with this problem. God, there are so many frustrating things about being female. chicagowife on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-464396 Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:51:04 +0000 chicagowife 464396@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ @lisalulu.  i hear you about living in a liberal area where people look down on women who change their names!  I changed mine because I like sharing this fundamental thing and I'm excited about our family having all one name, as in "The Smiths" or "The Johnsons."  And here's the thing -- we have these couple friends who are very liberal, and the husband told my husband that he's jealous that I took my husband's name!  He said he would never ask his wife too, but he wishes she had. All in all, it was a hard transition at times, but I'm so glad I did!  :) krissycake on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-464291 Wed, 11 Nov 2009 14:49:08 +0000 krissycake 464291@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ I'm changing mine, and it's been an interesting discussion with certain coworkers...most of them are like, "oh, you're traditional, that's great" and that's that, but there is one certain outspoken colleague of mine that flat out stated, "I didn't change mine because I like it (maiden name) too much...besides, it used to mean you're property of him, and I am not a piece of property or an animal." Now, I am used to her oddball comments, but I really just held my tongue on that one and smiled and said, "see, that's the great thing about our modern age - we have the right to pick what we want to do."     luli29 on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-464289 Wed, 11 Nov 2009 14:48:40 +0000 luli29 464289@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ One funny thing I thought of right now....if this trend to combine last names continues...at what point does it just get ridiculous For example: Me: Miss. A; Him: Mr. B Married: Mrs B-A then if I have a kid who does not want to give up her name they would be Mrs C-B-A then D-C-B-A... you get the point... hehe   luli29 on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-464279 Wed, 11 Nov 2009 14:44:40 +0000 luli29 464279@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ I honestly don't even have to think about it..I will definitely be taking my husbands last name. I don't think there's anything wrong with tradition, and I also don't think its wrong not to want to take your husband's last name.  Marinara on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-464266 Wed, 11 Nov 2009 14:37:18 +0000 Marinara 464266@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ I'm not going to change my name, but I do sometimes wish we could have the same last name.  I wish he would take mine!  It would be just as weird for him as it would be for me, though.  (Probably weirder since it's not the tradition for men.)  It's no accident that women are the ones who change their name.  It stems from coveture -- it used to be that when a woman married she was legally dead.  Her legal identity was completely absorbed by her husband's, so under the law, the wife was the husband.  This is why married people could not enter into contracts with each other (you can't have a contract with yourself) and one of the reasons why there was "no such thing" as marital rape (until the 1970's and 1980's in this country :-O ). Arachna on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-462909 Wed, 11 Nov 2009 06:34:18 +0000 Arachna 462909@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ Quitar, try dropping his last, not legally and not all the time but just enough that people still associate you with yourlast and see at as important as your new last.  If you sign some things yourfirst yourlast and then sign it yourfirst yourlast hislast and then yourfirst yourlast I think they're more likely to think your full name is yourlast hislast. darling blackbird on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-462425 Tue, 10 Nov 2009 20:41:11 +0000 darling blackbird 462425@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ I think I'm settling on adopting my last name as my middle name, but I'm sad to see my middle name go, as it is my paternal grandmother's name.  My sister has my maternal grandmother's name as her middle name, and I love that heritage in our names.  But I've always been Katie B and I'm sort of sad to think about having a different name than my parents...so I am constantly switching between keeping my middle name and changing it.  As for the last name, I am looking forward to having a name that people can pronounce and spell!  That, and I feel part of his family, so it doesn't feel like I'm losing my sense of self. To me, it's not even an issue of feminism; it's an issue of retaining my heritage and a connection to my family in my name. guitargirl on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-461590 Tue, 10 Nov 2009 17:51:26 +0000 guitargirl 461590@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ I am sloooowly starting to change my name to Myfirst MyMiddle MyLast Hislast (legally), and going by MyFirst MyMaiden HisLast, but everyone keeps dropping MyMaiden.  It so frustrates me, because it is my name, and I am not giving it up.  I call people whatever names they want to be called.  I know I can go around correcting everyone, but that gets really old, really quickly.  I changed my email signature to what I want to be called.  Any other suggestions? wonderlanded on "Name Changing Emotions and feminist socieoconomic weirdness" http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/name-changing-emotions-and-feminist-socieoconomic-weirdness/page/2#post-457472 Mon, 09 Nov 2009 09:09:20 +0000 wonderlanded 457472@http://boards.weddingbee.com/ From my experience, with a hyphenated name people are just as likely to drop the last syllable as the first -- I think sunshinebride may be right, but that's entirely anecdotal!  I think if it's done without hyphens -- ie two last names -- the middle one is much more likely to be dropped. But I think hyphenated last names may be more common here in the UK than in the US.... To be honest, our choice for hypothetical children is based on cadence -- MyLast-HisLast just sounds good. Mine is a single syllable ending in a consonant, his is two syllables ending in a 'y' sound. Plus, MyLast comes much earlier in the alphabet, and I liked being an earlier-in-the-alphabet person when I was at school. <a href="http://boards.weddingbee.com/profile/gabrielleelise1981"></a>