We're down to two weeks now and literally everyone's getting on my nerves. I'm actually typing while we're discussing "loudly" on what's gonna go on on our wedding day. I've been so patient. I've let everybody have there input just so people would get off my back. Two weeks away? I just need to coast and relax and not worry about a damn thing. Is that too much to ask? My plans are set for that day. I don't need anybody alternating it to fit what they want. Sorry I'm just rambling on and on with no specifics. I wish so bad that we could've just had a civil wedding. And top of that FI still keeps bringing up this couple he wants to invite knowing full well that I don't like them at all. He's gone as far as to lie to me stating that this couple help pitched in for our honeymoon present (plane tickets.) Let's see... he barely can keep a job, has 5 kids and can barely make rent. Right, I'm sure he pitched in. He can barely support his own family. Months ago FI casually brought up their name. He said"I feel bad b/c he always ask me to go fishing with him" Is that a good enough reason to invite someone to your wedding??? When he told me they pitched in for our wedding gift I simply told him that that was nice, we'll make sure to send them a thank you card. Grrrrrrr!
And "B-R-E-A-T-H-E"....tensions are high (which is normal) and you don't have too much time to go.
Remember to schedule some quiet time for yourself without anyone else, including FI, around for a hot bath, a solo blog/journal session at a coffee house, or even a quiet meal out by yourself. Take the time to focus and center yourself and remember everyone is probably just as excited and looking to the day with joy and anticipation.
Everything will be fine :) I wish you a lifetime of happiness and laughter, love comes out of those.
We are also close (three weeks out) and it seems like everyone has gone nutty. In the past week, three separate family situations have been brought up. Grrr! I'm trying to keep calm and roll with what I can and hold firm on the rest.
Occasionista has some good advice - schedule some time away to de-stress. I think weddings can make people crazy and in the heat of everything, the main purpose - joining with your sweetie in front of your nearest and dearest - gets lost in all the madness.
Thanks guys. I knew you'd understand this craziness. I would so love to take some time out for just myself. Short staffed at work (plenty of lay offs last month) my extra time is spent with my non-wedding related coworkers. LOL I love how I don't have to talk wedding with them. I envy the ones that just have to deal with work and school. I'm excited for the wedding. Don't get me wrong. I would love it if people... mostly family would just relax... be at peace... and leave me the hell alone. Ha ha My dad brought over their guest list today and rght before they left our house he casually said oh the names with the stars next to it.... make sure they don't sit anywhere near eachother. Thanks. WTHeck?!??! Will I be part of some wierd wedding doggy pile?
So the FI was just not getting what I want or WHO I don't want at our wedding What part of I hate them does he not understand???? LOL I just pulled up our online gueslist and on the very last page the two names I don't ever want to see is on our list. WTF?!??! Do I just give up? Now I know why he pulled out one of our extra invites... to F****in' formerly invite them? With all the request from me for this wedding... I'm pretty much just a body to wear a dress and walk down the aisle. Who cares what I want right? Everybody got a say in everything about the wedding. I just got to choose the dress.
It's your FI wedding as well, right? I'm assuming that you aren't talking about him making all the choices, because a lot of woman would die to have their FI involved in planning. Suck it up, it's done. There isn't anything you can do to change it if he's already sent the invite anyway. Just relax and enjoy these next couple of days.
Oh dear, you are having a bad time of it. I'm so sorry. It's like all your hard work is getting pulled out from underneath you and co-opted by everyone, driving you crazy in the process.
I would be really angry too if my fiance invited people I hated behind my back. But alas you're stuck with it. However, how many people are coming to your wedding? If it's anything over 50, then they're going to get lost in the crowd. You aren't going to have to spend more than 2 minutes interacting with them (or maybe leave it to your FI?). Concentrate on all the wonderful people that you like that are coming and make sure to spend lots of time with them instead. That's how I am thinking about dealing with all the people I don't like that are coming to my wedding (but that I invited because it was important to my parents).
To all the family members driving you crazy, tune them out as much as possible. If they make reasonable requests that you don't mind coming to fruition, ask whomever makes said request to take care of it themselves if it is so important to them, as you are too busy (too busy...relaxing! :)) to deal with that extraneous detail right now. Then go relax.
that's the way it always is.. especially if you have big ethnic family like mine...
i just told everybody to lay off because this is my day and whatever happens happens. You fiance should help you to deal with all the madness.. mine did all tho guys are guys and they will always do things that make us angry because they don't always think. :)
Agreed...it's his wedding too. Let it go, have a good time at the wedding, and be thankful you won't start the marriage out by giving your husband something to hold a grudge about.
We're down to two weeks now and literally everyone's getting on my nerves. I'm actually typing while we're discussing "loudly" on what's gonna go on on our wedding day. I've been so patient. I've let everybody have there input just so people would get off my back. Two weeks away? I just need to coast and relax and not worry about a damn thing. Is that too much to ask? My plans are set for that day. I don't need anybody alternating it to fit what they want. Sorry I'm just rambling on and on with no specifics. I wish so bad that we could've just had a civil wedding. And top of that FI still keeps bringing up this couple he wants to invite knowing full well that I don't like them at all. He's gone as far as to lie to me stating that this couple help pitched in for our honeymoon present (plane tickets.) Let's see... he barely can keep a job, has 5 kids and can barely make rent. Right, I'm sure he pitched in. He can barely support his own family. Months ago FI casually brought up their name. He said"I feel bad b/c he always ask me to go fishing with him" Is that a good enough reason to invite someone to your wedding??? When he told me they pitched in for our wedding gift I simply told him that that was nice, we'll make sure to send them a thank you card. Grrrrrrr!
posted by NorCalBride 307 posts 2 months agoAnd "B-R-E-A-T-H-E"....tensions are high (which is normal) and you don't have too much time to go.
Remember to schedule some quiet time for yourself without anyone else, including FI, around for a hot bath, a solo blog/journal session at a coffee house, or even a quiet meal out by yourself. Take the time to focus and center yourself and remember everyone is probably just as excited and looking to the day with joy and anticipation.
Everything will be fine :) I wish you a lifetime of happiness and laughter, love comes out of those.
au revior,
The Occasionista
posted by occasionista 16 posts 2 months agoWe are also close (three weeks out) and it seems like everyone has gone nutty. In the past week, three separate family situations have been brought up. Grrr! I'm trying to keep calm and roll with what I can and hold firm on the rest.
Occasionista has some good advice - schedule some time away to de-stress. I think weddings can make people crazy and in the heat of everything, the main purpose - joining with your sweetie in front of your nearest and dearest - gets lost in all the madness.
posted by missm 483 posts 2 months agoThanks guys. I knew you'd understand this craziness. I would so love to take some time out for just myself. Short staffed at work (plenty of lay offs last month) my extra time is spent with my non-wedding related coworkers. LOL I love how I don't have to talk wedding with them. I envy the ones that just have to deal with work and school. I'm excited for the wedding. Don't get me wrong. I would love it if people... mostly family would just relax... be at peace... and leave me the hell alone. Ha ha My dad brought over their guest list today and rght before they left our house he casually said oh the names with the stars next to it.... make sure they don't sit anywhere near eachother. Thanks. WTHeck?!??! Will I be part of some wierd wedding doggy pile?
posted by NorCalBride 307 posts 2 months agoSo the FI was just not getting what I want or WHO I don't want at our wedding
What part of I hate them does he not understand???? LOL I just pulled up our online gueslist and on the very last page the two names I don't ever want to see is on our list. WTF?!??! Do I just give up? Now I know why he pulled out one of our extra invites... to F****in' formerly invite them? With all the request from me for this wedding... I'm pretty much just a body to wear a dress and walk down the aisle. Who cares what I want right? Everybody got a say in everything about the wedding. I just got to choose the dress. 
posted by NorCalBride 307 posts 2 months agoIt's your FI wedding as well, right? I'm assuming that you aren't talking about him making all the choices, because a lot of woman would die to have their FI involved in planning. Suck it up, it's done. There isn't anything you can do to change it if he's already sent the invite anyway. Just relax and enjoy these next couple of days.
posted by KateMW 483 posts 2 months agoOh dear, you are having a bad time of it. I'm so sorry. It's like all your hard work is getting pulled out from underneath you and co-opted by everyone, driving you crazy in the process.
I would be really angry too if my fiance invited people I hated behind my back. But alas you're stuck with it. However, how many people are coming to your wedding? If it's anything over 50, then they're going to get lost in the crowd. You aren't going to have to spend more than 2 minutes interacting with them (or maybe leave it to your FI?). Concentrate on all the wonderful people that you like that are coming and make sure to spend lots of time with them instead. That's how I am thinking about dealing with all the people I don't like that are coming to my wedding (but that I invited because it was important to my parents).
To all the family members driving you crazy, tune them out as much as possible. If they make reasonable requests that you don't mind coming to fruition, ask whomever makes said request to take care of it themselves if it is so important to them, as you are too busy (too busy...relaxing! :)) to deal with that extraneous detail right now. Then go relax.
posted by chelseamorning 205 posts 2 months agothat's the way it always is.. especially if you have big ethnic family like mine...
i just told everybody to lay off because this is my day and whatever happens happens. You fiance should help you to deal with all the madness.. mine did all tho guys are guys and they will always do things that make us angry because they don't always think. :)
posted by GoIzzy 17 posts 2 months agoAgreed...it's his wedding too. Let it go, have a good time at the wedding, and be thankful you won't start the marriage out by giving your husband something to hold a grudge about.
posted by arm78 7 posts 2 months agoposted by arm78 7 posts 2 months ago