1st trimester…anyone else having a hard time getting *in the mood*?

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
1147 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@swanks4tw:  Completely normal & rumor has it your libido comes back in the 2nd trimester. DH & I probably only DTD a hand full of times my first trimester because I wasn’t in the mood, I was too tired & to be honest it didn’t feel that great. I’m “lucky” in the sense that DH doesn’t have a strong sex drive either so I wasn’t feeling guilty about it. As I got through the bloat and mind numbing fatigue we started to DTD more. We’re probably up to 2 maybe 3 times a week which was our “normal” before pregnancy.

Post # 4
cherrypieBee
1059 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008 - A tiny town just outside of Glacier National Park

Jesus, yes. I have to force myself. It’s gotten a little better since weeks 3-5 but not much. Plus I’m struggling with yeast, which at least gives me a break but I feel gross on top of not sexy. Gripe.

Post # 5
Member
7262 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

I had to kind of force myself in the first trimester, but the orgasms were the best. I had the most interest in the 2nd tri, but my orgasms dissappeared. In the 3rd tri, I’ve lost interest again and the orgasms are still missing…

🙁

Post # 6
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@swanks4tw: In the first tri here, we have been intimate twice (I’ve been so tired and somewhat moody). I was feeling in the mood last night, so we decide to go for it. Honestly though, after 5 minutes, I just wasn’t feeling it and everything he did hurt or felt weird and everything he said just didn’t make me feel sexy or in the mood. It was a real downer for me as I too feel bad for him because he hasn’t gotten any in probably close to 3 or 4 weeks now. He assures me it is ok, but I do feel bad. It isn’t his fault, but honestly it really isn’t mine either.

I am hoping @ThePrincessBride10612: is right and that the sex drive will return soon because this is just not fun.

Post # 7
Member
787 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I’m nearing the end of my 2nd trimester and I’m still having this issue.  I don’t feel AS guilty because pregnant sex freaks my husband out, especially now that he can feel the baby move, but it does suck a little bit that we’re not very active anymore.  At least for us it’s mutual.

Post # 8
Member
1242 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012 - Chateau Briand

I feel horrible (and bad for DH) but I have not been in the mood at all! I’m currently 26w and we’ve had sex maybe twice this pregnancy? We’ve done other things but I know I need to kick it up a notch. Luckily DH doesn’t complain and when I whine about being a bad wife he tells me we have the rest of our lives to make up for it 🙂 

Post # 9
cherrypieBee
1059 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008 - A tiny town just outside of Glacier National Park

Yeah, I’ve been having super intense orgasms when I actually convince myself to do the deed. I will admit that this is one situation where I really value the fact that we’re in a polyamorous relationship. I call his girlfriend “the sex doula,” because he gets his needs met and I don’t feel crappy about having to force myself (which isn’t gonna happen with a YI anyway). There have been a few “are you sure it’s still ok?” conversations and I’m like “GOD YES, PLEASE LET ME OFF THE HOOK FOR A WHILE.”

Post # 10
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I haven’t been in the mood either – basically since we conceived. He actually said that is when he started suspected we had conceived – when I gave him the cold shoulder lol.  I have forced myself a few times and certainly enjoy it once we get going. Poor DH.

Post # 11
Member
644 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

We’ve only done it once since we found out and I would have rather gone to the dentist. Luckily DH seems to understand and hasn’t made any comments. I’ve been really sick though so I think he’s probably just worried I’d puke on him if he tried anything!

Post # 12
Member
994 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

In the first trimester dh was lucky if I was awake when he got home. Lol I was too tired to remember what the mood felt like. It for better in my second trimester the mood returned but health issues made it hard to participate as frequently as we’d like. Those are getting worked out so we’ll see if things improve in that department. Lol

Post # 13
Member
324 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I must not be in the norm at all!  Still in my first tri, just over 10w, and my sex drive has gone through the roof.  DH is getting it at least twice a day during the week and more on weekends… orgasms are super intense as PP have mentioned!  Although there have been a couple times where I am nauseated after from the motion I think lol

Post # 14
Member
2174 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Ha!  We did it once before my MS set in.  These days, I’m vomiting too much to be attractive or to have the energy to even think about it.

Post # 15
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I feel gross, I’m forcing myself, and some days I just flat-out tell him no. Or shudder when touched. I feel bad… I’m grateful that he has a sense of humor about it. Here’s to hoping I feel like a human again in the 2nd tri.

Post # 16
Member
2258 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Ugh. I’m 17 weeks and still have absolutely no interest at all. I can count on one hand the number of times we’ve done the deed since we got our BFP. And being that we were BDing like bunnies for 5 months to get this BFP, it was quite the change for poor DH! Luckily, he’s been very understanding, but I still feel bad. 🙁

Definitely seems like I’m not alone, though, and that’s good to know!

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