- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
Ok somehow, I accidently deleted my post so here it goes again.
My fiance and I have been planning for about a year to get married in Morelia Mexico, where alot of his family lives. I have been down there a few times and I love it. The date is set for Nov 29. We have the Historic Cathedral reserved as well as a really nice hall. And then last night tradedgy happens. On the eve of the mexican independace when people has gathered to celebrate 2 grenades were thrown into the crowd killing 7 and injuring more then 100. The attack is linked to the upset drug loards who have been pressured by the president. Morelia is his hometown, the pres was in Mexico city at the time. My family was weary of going to Mexico before this happened now they are scared they will be walking into a drug war. I know saftey always comes first and I would not take them if I did not feel safe but I still feel safe. But if something happened I would never forgive myself. But I have been really excited about the wedding in Mexico and sharing the beauty of the city and its culture with my family. Oh I forgot to mention the plaza where this happened is the plaza where the cathedral is located in, so it is right where we will be. Should I have a plan B? The only good thing if it came to that is: The invitation have not gone out yet, supposed to this weekend. My dress is getting picked up this weekend as well, but I am buying off the rack so if the location changed my dress could to but I really love my dress. Also no one has purchased tickets yet, and the hall deposit is refundable minus 10 percent for the booking. So what do I do, have my dream wedding or a safer thrown together cheap wedding plan B. The link to the news story is below,
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/17/world/americas/17mexico.html
I would change it. Knowing myself, I would worry and freak out about this all the time because it would be at the back of my head or just lingering above me. I wouldn't want people to have second thoughts about coming and having to worry about anything other than not being late for their flight. :)
You will be stressed out with other details as it is. Don't let this add to your plate. It's a heavy one to lift.
You might want to at least start looking into a Plan B. If it were me, I don't think I would be able to relax on the wedding day if I were concerned about another grenade attack. I would prefer to bring Mexico to my guests in the US rather than take my guests to Mexico. You can still share the culture without the venue. I'm not sure why the dress couldn't come to you as well. That doesn't sound like it needs to change. No matter you choose, good luck!
I think asking your family to compromise their feelings of safety would be really unfair. As a note you may "feel" safe, but when anyone from my company travels to Mexico with work there are very strict security requirements such as not going beyond office/hotel and always having an (armed) driver. So objectively it is not considered a safe place to travel to.
I think you should at least look into a Plan B. Even though you may feel safe, if your family doesn't feel safe many may not come and others who do come may feel uncomfortable. There's only so much you can do to assuage their fears, especially since the U.S. govt has a travel alert posted for Mexico (a travel alert is less serious than a travel warning, which is for persistently dangerous places like Iran and the Congo). That you can get out of your plans with minimal financial loss should encourage you even more to investigate alternatives.
It boils down to, what makes a wedding a dream wedding? Is it the venue or the location or the dress (and if you change your venue why would you have to give up your dress?)? Or is it the people you love coming to see you get married?
If I were you, I would talk to my fiance and his family and see how they feel. If they are not too concerned, I wouldn't be either. They will know if the area is safe or not, and I'm sure would not want to put themselves in danger either. I don't usually worry about these things, though, so I may not be a good example.
The "unprecedented levels of violence in recent months" line makes me pretty wary. The place sounds absolutely beautiful, but just not the right atmosphere for now. Definitely look into another place, and maybe schedule a vow renewal a few years down the road in Morelia?
Yeah, I'd change it. I hate to tell you to do that - I'm sure the spot is gorgeous, but parts of Mexico are just really dangerous right now. At this point, I'd be afraid that you'd exit the gorgeous cathedral, step into the courtyard and think, "OH yeah, this is where the grenade went off." That's not really a good thought to cross your mind on your wedding day. Definitely weigh in with your FI and his family, but I agree with pp that asking your family to put their safety at risk is an awkward and slightly unfair thing to do, even though it's for good reason.
Hang in there -- all this violence in Mexico is such a sad thing. Such a beautiful country.
CIMG3167.JPG (50.1 KB, 15 downloads) 2 years old CIMG3162.JPG (53.4 KB, 15 downloads) 2 years old CIMG3163.JPG (53 KB, 54 downloads) 2 years old CIMG3161.JPG (49.4 KB, 53 downloads) 2 years old 
Um, yeah. You may feel safe, but as an accident analyst I can tell you that feelings of safety (or perception of risk in general) are usually more a factor of familiarity (or unfamiliarity) than a rational decision based on factual data. If your family and friends have a perception that they could be in danger, your "feeling" of safety is never going to convince them otherwise. And from a factual standpoint, there is a State Department Travel Advisory on Mexico at the moment:
http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_pa_tw/pa/pa_3028.html
They don't issue those lightly or without reason. I would strongly consider changing your location. Making your guests choose between supporting you and feeling like they are taking their lives in their hands is unfair, regardless of your feelings on the matter.
Are your guests white? I know I might sound extreme but with the political turmoil and the direct attack on people...I wouldn't risk kidnappings. Seriously, if there's a war between drug lords and the goverment they might be tempted to keep tourists as insurance.
As beautiful as the city might be...I wouldn't risk it...If I was an informed guest...I would decline for my safety and the safety of my family. Just in case.
wang_5.jpg (45.5 KB, 43 downloads) 2 years old
I think you should change it. Between kidnappings, the ongoing drug war, the travel advisory and the political turmoil-- plus the fact that you would be in a very public area, as opposed to a secluded resort-- it just does not sound like a good idea right now. I hate to think of it this way, but a big American wedding could easily become a target for someone who wanted to "make a statement."
I like the suggestion of planning a vow renewal for a few years down the road.
Man, what a tough situation!
I think you should go with your gut feeling, but as a resident of Mexico I would like to just put in my $.02 about who is really "objectively" at risk here. The violence that happened this Independence Day was the first time people outside the drug world have really been targeted. People are rightfully freaked out about that. Who knows if it's the beginning of a trend. Or maybe it will not happen again.
As a rule, Americans are among the people LEAST at risk for drug-related violence, kidnapping and what-have-you. Terrorism in Mexico is NOT like terrorism in the Middle East... it tends to be not random (with the exception of what I mentioned above) and foreigners are MUCH less likely to be kidnapped or attacked than Mexicans. Attacking Americans just gets people like the FBI involved, and no druglord wants that, trust me.
I just wanted to say that to set straight some misconceptions. I personally choose to live here, I love it, I plan to stay and obviously I fully accept the risks that come along with it. For me, it is more than worth it. However, I recognize that many Americans will be too scared to come (although I personally may consider it an overreaction) so if you want to go ahead with your wedding, you will have to accept their decisions.
Saludos, Kitty
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| ellisrobertson | 22 |
| MsPanda | 14 |
| aduarte3201 | 14 |
| pengoala | 11 |
| ShellVee | 10 |
| ladyartichoke | 10 |
| ndreighton | 10 |
| londonchick | 9 |
| likelimeade | 8 |
| londonpeach84 | 8 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| ellisrobertson | 9 |
 KimKimmieKim |
7 |
| londonchick | 4 |
| pengoala | 3 |
| londonpeach84 | 3 |
| dlujan | 3 |
| BearcatBetch |
3 |
| julies1949 | 2 |
| zippylef | 2 |
| Leahhh | 2 |
My fiance and I have been planning for about a year now to get married in Morelia, Mexico. Where alot of his family lives. I have been down there a few times and love it. We have reserved the Cathedral and a beautiful hall, the nicest in the city. The wedding date is Nov 29. And now last night on the eve of the Mexican independance when alot of people had gathered for a celebration some grenades were thrown into the crowd. 7 people were killed and over 100 were injured. The plaza this happened in is right across the street from the Cathedral! My family has already been weary of traveling to Mexico, and now they are very concerned. I know nothing is worth a tradegdy, I would never forgive myself. But I was really excited about getting married down there, I have always wanted to share that with my family. Should I have a plan B, we discussed pushing it back or changing the location. But I don't know what to do. If it was not there it might as well be here back in the states. But we don't have that kind of money to throw togeather a whole wedding in 2 months. The only good thing Is invitations havent gone out yet, they were going out next week, and my dress gets picked up this weekend, but I am buying off the rack it is on hold so I could change it if location changed but I love that dress. Do we go with the dreamed wedding or a safe hastely thrown together wedding?
Here is the link to the story, oh and I forgot to say alot of the violence is caused by the drug loards upset because the president is cracking down on all of the drug cartells.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/17/world/americas/17mexico.html