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Could the fathers both wear black vests? So it would be groom - white, groomsmen - brown, fathers - black? or another wedding color?
I don't know about your first question though, I have the same dilema with MOHs!
I would list Best Man...Name and Best Man...Name. Or if you are doing columns you could list Best Men and the names under.
For the tuxes, for my wedding both dads will be renting tuxes. Our groomsen will be wearing teal vests and black ties. I dont want the dads wearing the same so they will probably wear black vests and black ties, my FI will be wearing an ivory vest and black tie. If your dad owns a tux he can still wear it and maybe rent a vest if its a color he doesnt own and then your FFIL can rent a tux that is the same colors as your dad.
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I have two matrons of honor and I am putting that in my program like your first option, where they each have their own line.
With the whole ffil and your fathers attire. I would have ffil wear a tux like your dad, but have them wear tie and vest that would not interfere with what the groom is wearing.
They did leave it up to you to decide and it sounds like you have done a lot to keep with tradition and make them happy, that this can be the one thing that they can compromise with is not sticking with tradition by having the fathers not match the groomsmen. I am not having the dads look like the groomsmen because in my opinion they are not groomsmen so they don't need to match. The dads are getting ties that are the same as the wedding colors, so whatever design they choose they are not matching but still similar. I totally understand that it is a pain, my ffil wanted to match with the groomsmen but put an end to that right away!
I would do Best Men (2nd example). It just sounds better to me.
I think it would be weird to have the fathers dressed like your wedding party. They should be distinct.
Not sure about the best men.
My dad is wearing a different tie than the groomsmen. The groomsmen are wearing euro ties (regular ones basically) and my dad is in a bowtie. He wanted to be a little different. FFIL is in his military uniform so i know it doesn't help but I didn't want my dad matching the groomsmen. Too much matchy mattchy with the bridal party
4435406134_e2988b38e1.jpg (85.2 KB, 58 downloads) 1 year old 4434632101_fd703099d7.jpg (86.8 KB, 50 downloads) 1 year old 
Have you actually done your program layout yet?
Your layout may dictate how it goes. They both sound fine.
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1-FI has two best men. How should I word that in the wedding program?
Best Man.... John Smith
Best Man... Kevin Tucker
or
Best Men... John Smith & Kevin Tucker
or something different?
2nd Question- What do the Fathers of the bride & groom usually wear? My dad has his own tux that he wants to wear because he doesn't want to spend money and rent one. FI's dad wants to wear exactly what the groomsmen are wearing (rented tuxes with brown vest & tie). He says that that's the way it should be. However, I don't want my dad to be left out because FI's dad is wearing what everyone else is. FI and his parents got into a big tiff and now left it up to me. FI's dad doesn't own a tux and will need to rent one regardless. But maybe he should wear a cream color vest & tie, instead of brown? My dad will probably wear just white & black. Or will this be too much like the groom?
I'm so confused over this and really wouldn't care, I just don't want my dad to be the only one different. FI's family is so "tradition this" and "tradition that" it's driven me insane this whole wedding planning. Any honest oppinions and thoughts are welcome. Thanks bees.