Post # 1
Here I am, planning what is supposed to be the happiest day of my life… and yet all I am meeting is resistance with family members; mine and his. His can’t settle on a date, seems there is ALWAYS something that conflicts… Mine want it in NY… no if ands or buts…
We live in Texas, we want the wedding in Texas. My sister and Maid/Matron of Honor brought up the idea of doing a second reception in NY for all the family and friends that wouldn’t be able to travel out for the wedding.
I plan on sending invitations to everyone for the wedding that would also include information about a 2nd reception in NY. My fear is that people will see this as “tacky” and a “money maker”… but that’s not it at all. I grew up in NY, and there are a lot of friends and family that won’t come out to the wedding and I’d still like to have them involved…
Im about ready to go to Mexico and say screw the wedding planning and just elope.
Post # 3
i know lots of couples that have done two receptions its not tacky in my books. in fact we are planning on doing it ourselves because of financial reasons.
our wedding is very small (40 people or less), but we know it could have easily been 150+ people at our wedding. so we are doing a small reception a couple weeks later where the people that came to the wedding are welcome along with 60 other guests to celebrate with us. its just going to be short, dessert and lots of fruit, we’ll cut the cake again, toss the boquet, and show a slide show of us dating, engaged and some wedding photos.
sometimes thats just how you have to do things.
Post # 4
Just say, “we understand that not everyone may be able to travel to TX for our wedding. If not, we’d love to see you on X date at X location to celebrate with friends and family who were unable to make the occassion”
It makes perfect sense to me!
Post # 5
My friends recently had two receptions. They got married in France and had a reception, and then had another reception here in Dallas, since they live here. Even though their situation is a little different then yours, its not tacky at all. Having two receptions is actually a nice gesture & makes it easier on everyone.
For example, you NY guests won’t have to fork up a plane ticket to come to Texas for your wedding, you will be going to them, who can ask for more?
I don’t think people will see this a ploy for getting more gifts, but rather see it as you being accomidating & wanting to celebrate with them.
Post # 6
I don’t think its tacky at all. Sometimes its just not feasible to expect all of your friend and relatives to be able to travel the distance. Its definitely not a money maker because it’ll be costing you guys more to do it. I say you should definitely do it if its in your budget. I recently met a nice couple and they had one here in NYC and another in California. The issue was similar, the immediate and extended families were on 2 separate sides of the country and their friends were scattered all around the globe. It was easy for them because the family in NYC paid for that reception, or at least most of it, the family in Cali took care of that one and the friends could just decide which one they’d like to attend.
Post # 7
We’re basically having two weddings – our actual wedding where we’ll get married in Connecticut where I’m from with a reception after – full dinner, bar, dancing, etc… for about 175 people.
Then two weeks later we’ll be back in Ireland and do it all again – another Mass to bless our marriage and another reception – full dinner, bar, dancing etc… also for about 175 people!
Thankfully our parents are paying for a lot of the reception(s)’ elements so that makes it easier on us (except for the planning part – still have to do both!) and it was what we talked about doing way before we were engaged. We have guests who will fly each way so we’re really excited to be able to celebrate with our families and friends.
I don’t think it’s tacky at all – I think it’s twice the joy!
Post # 8
I think that is a fabulous idea!!!! It’s a great way to celebrate with both sets of friends. I know if I was in NY and unable to travel to the wedding, I’d be THRILLED you were having a NY reception! And, it’s a great excuse to wear your dress twice!! 🙂
I’m learning that the initial stages of wedding planning are THE WORST!!! So, bear down, and get through this hard part and the rest of your planning should be a bit easier!! The bees will keep you sane! 🙂
Post # 9
I am having one reception here in Dallas and another in Houston. Mom was disappointed she couldn’t be a part of most of the wedding planning so her solution: plan her own reception. But the reception in Dallas is a Vintage Glam 1940s style and the reception in Houston is Asian. So… both sides get to be happy. Makes perfect sense to me.
Post # 10
we had two receptions and sent a save the date for the 2nd reception in with our wedding invitations, [only to those who lived in hubby’s hometown].
Two receptions are very normal, and I think sending the invites together or around the same time will help guests decide which they can make it to (no one usually feels obligated to go to both except immediate family and close friends)
Post # 11
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
2 receptions is very common–it’s a great way to celebrate with two families that live far apart. It’s not tacky; don’t worry about it! I might invite only close family from your side to the TX reception and only close family from his side to the NY one, though, although there’s no reason you’d HAVE to do it that way…
Post # 12
we’re doing 2 too, because we’re a long-distance couple and most people couldn’t fly 8,000 miles for our wedding. we had 40 people at that one, but the ‘hometown reception’ for my husband’s side would probably number 120 or so.
Post # 13
We are also doing two. The actual wedding will be 70 people at a winery, a 7 hour drive from us. We will also be hosting a second party closer to home (or at home) a month or two later for those that can’t make it.
Post # 14
We’re having 2 and I love it! My Future Mother-In-Law will throw us our 2nd reception offered to throw us a 2nd reception in England since my finace is fromt here and many from his family cannot come to the States. I’m so happy since I’ll be able to share this joy a 2nd time and with others. And…I get to wear my dress again!
Post # 15
Sounds perfectly okay to me 🙂
Post # 16
One of my good firend’s is actually doing this for a similar reason. It is totally acceptable (and welcomed) by guests that truely want to celebrate with you.