3 weeks notice for a wedding…

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
7055 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

kgibbler:  3 weeks’ notice isn’t too bad… if no travel was involved. For any other party, give me 3 weeks’ notice and I’ll be there, so why not for a wedding.

But when you need to travel, 3 weeks’ notice is very short and no one could fault you for not being able to make it. I’d also be reluctant to buy a plane ticket on the basis of a single text. Is she going to do proper invitations? Even an email would be ok, but just a text… it doesn’t sound very organised and I’d be scared she’ll cancel a week later.

That said, if she was a good friend, I was sure it was happening, and money wasn’t a problem, I’d probably find a way – but it’s fine if you can’t.

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by  aussiemum1248.
Post # 3
1248 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

kgibbler:  Yes of course. If someone gives guests 3 weeks notice for anything they have to travel 3 hours each way too they have to expect that many won’t be able to make it. If it were a *really* good friend and I could get out of the other stuff without hurting others feelings then I’d try and make it, if not then I’d have to decline.  

Post # 4
42166 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

kgibbler:  You don’t have to justify anything. It’s an invitation not a command performance. You can choose to decline with no explanation needed. Surely she will not be surprised that some of the invited guests will be unable to attend on such short notice.


Post # 5
5793 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

It’s fine to tell her you can’t make it on such notice. It’s not fine for you to pass judgment on why she is planning on such short notice. For all you know, the venue did have a cancellation and offered her a massive discount to fill a space that would otherwise go empty and earn them no money, and your friend didn’t want to go into debt for her wedding.


Post # 6
27 posts

3 weeks is not much time, especially in the summer when most people have plans on weekends. Like all weddings, if you’d like to go then you should, but you’re not obligated regardless of how much advance notice you recieve. 

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