3rd cycle TTC: what were your emotions during this time?

posted 2 years ago in TTC
Post # 2
Member
208 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m currently in my third cycle as well. I’m pretty worried. Mostly just longing to be pregnant Like you. lately I’ve found myself being more negative about the whole thing. I’m trying to work on that. I feel like all the fun and excitement of trying to have a baby Has passed. Before TTC I was consumed with baby stuff and planning and wishing but now I’m just back to regular life. I’m not sure if that’s much help though!! But I’m being honest. I didn’t know a lot about TTC Until I started joining the boards on the bee so I always assumed that it would be quick. Now I know differently.

Post # 3
Member
13021 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

By my 3rd month, I had just ovulated once, so I was in what the f**k mode.  By the 3rd cycle, 7 months later, I’d had 2 90+ day cycles with one “normal” 40 day one in between and was a combo of fustration and stubbornness to wait for a few natural cycles, which luckily the next 3 were.  But by then a year later I all ‘time to see a doc and do whatever the hell it takes’.  And another year later, I’m kind just fed up and starting to imagine what a life without children would be like and if I want that or if I want to keep trying.

Post # 4
Member
3828 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

pinkshoes:  🙁 i’m always hoping for you and keeping everything crossed. 

TogetherThroughLife:  I’m at 8 or 9 cycles TTC. By month 3 i was sure it would happen, symtom spotting like crazy, being crazy in general. Now i’m sure i need medical intervention, so i’m alot calmer. I’m also going between “why am i rushing to have kids? EVERY older married couple i know says not to rush it” and “PREGNATE ME GODDAMMIT”. I really do hate TTC. 

Post # 5
Member
7098 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

First cycle: BFN, I cried and was upset about it.

Second cycle: BFP! Lost it at 6W3D, cried and was upset about it. Again.

Third cycle: 40 day cycle after my MC…whatever. Didn’t really try. OB said to wait one cycle before trying again anyway.

Fourth cycle (current): just trying to go with the flow this time. I can’t handle building myself up and then being upset every month. Feeling a little annoyed about the whole thing.

Post # 6
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

TogetherThroughLife:  I’m on my third cycle as well.  I feel way more relaxed this cycle, as though I’m not expecting it to happen.  The first two cycles I was SOO stoked about the idea of being pregnant and having a baby, but now I’m just reminding myself that for 80% of couples trying, it happens in the first 6 months… so I feel more patient, and less rushed at this point.

Don’t get me wrong, I still symptom spot, and TWW still sucks, but it just seems less stressy this month for me.

Post # 7
Member
2764 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

TogetherThroughLife: I was completely relaxed the first 3 cycles of TTC, but then I got a BFP that turned out to be a chemical pregnancy, then it happened 3 more times, so 4 losses. I started medical testing for the recurrent pregnancy loss and then I was diagnosed with low ovarian reserve and told donor eggs were my best option. I became depressed and anxious, but I think if not for the chemical pregnancies I would have remained calm and positive since most couples take up to 1 year to get pregnant and I started TTC thinking it would take us at least 6 months. Wishing you all the best and hoping you get your BFP soon!

Post # 9
Member
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

rockermeg:  This is exactly how I feel to, it’s our 3rd cycle to and I am so over it. The first two cycles I bounced back pretty quickly, but this time around I just feel so negative about the whole experience. I guess I just dread the upcoming dissapointment if AF shows again. 

Trying to stay busy with other projects, hobbies and having other things to look forward to helps me to not dwell on TTC and all the emotions that go with it, but I hear ya, I just want a baby! 

Post # 10
Member
208 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

mrsqueenb:  glad I’m not the only one!! I’m also trying to stay busy with other projects! FX for you !

TogetherThroughLife:  FX for you!

Post # 11
Member
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

TogetherThroughLife:  My third cycle was the first time I actually cried when AF showed up. I was a little upset for cycle 1 and 2, but I didn’t bother me as much. Now, I just started my TWW for my 4th cycle and I find myself having negative thoughts and assuming that it’s not going to be the month again. TTC really sucks 🙁 

Post # 13
Member
4677 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I was pretty hopefully during my third cycle.  It was our first cycle using preseed, we changed our routine from ED to EOD, I was really trying to eat more fruits and veggies.  And then AF came.  It was the first time I cried.  Now I’m on to my fourth cycle.  I have less hope for this one as my DH is going to be out of town until the day or two before I O, and I am a lot busier, so I’m trying not to get my hopes up.  Right now I’m just worried that this is going to go on month after month.  I’m not sure if I can handle this for a year or more.  I hope I don’t have to.  

Post # 14
Member
2251 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

TogetherThroughLife:  4th cycle here, each cycle has been a mixture of hope and excitement and then AF and tears. I try so hard not to get down when AF comes, but it’s hard. It helps to talk to DH and a couple of friends who “get it.” as DH said, whatever it takes, we WILL have a baby one day and that makes me feel better long term about it. 

Post # 15
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

Third cycle here. 11 DPO and negative tests and my temp is starting to slightly drop. I posted the other day and got some negative comments on how to keep positive because I am so discouraged. Isn’t it just amazing how you can do everything “right” and still end up disappointed? I was SO sure this was our month. Now my body is showing signs of it not being it.

I cried this mor ning with my temp drop.

I cried cycle 1 and 2.

I feel very blessed to have gotten pregnant on cycle 1 with my son in 2012. Now, we are having to be wayyyy more patient. I REALLY don’t want another August baby. I was like, a zillion pounds during the hot Oklahoma summer. But, it’s looking like a summer baby for us, if at all.

 

I have to say, it does make me feel a little bit better that I am not alone in my emotions!! Let’s get these babies, ladies!

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