4.5 months out…getting stressed

posted 3 years ago in May 2014
Post # 3
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

 

@MsGinkgo:  You’ll be okay! 🙂 Make lists, and organized by what needs to be done FIRST. 

Invitations first, definitely! At this point, go with something simple, pre-made, and to the point, and just get them done and mailed as quick as possible to get it out of the way. OR, I HIGHLY recommend doing e-invitations!!! 🙂 A friend of mine did everything online through their wedding website… the e-invites were pretty, animated, and eco-friendly (no paper waste!), and more importantly, it got to the guests quickly and efficiently.  RSVP’ing was done on their website, also online, which made things quick and easy, and easy for them to count up totals! ……By comparison, I sent out elaborate paper pocketfold invites… but I secretly marked each RSVP in the corner with a number code so that in case people did not fill out their names, I would have a code to know who that RSVP was sent to. And I had to use my secret code on three RSVPs where people checked off that they’d be attending, but did not fill out WHO would be attending!! Then I had to call them individually, and find out who exactly was coming (one? both? kids? no kids?). It was time consuming and difficult to pull all my RSVPs together and get a final count!!

DJ should be your next priority… Do some research for your area, and compare prices. Start thinking about music you’d like to play! Our DJ asked us to create a list of music that MUST be played, a do-NOT play list, as well as a list of generic genres we like. 🙂 

Then definitely an officiant.. We had a friend be our officiant (he had gone through the online thing to be a legal officiant years ago), but as a result, we had to come up with our entire ceremony since he didn’t have any pre-made ceremonies to read from.  Think about what you’d like your ceremony to consist of! Any unity ceremony? Hand fasting? Special readings? Remembering lost loved ones?

I don’t know anything about liquor licenses, so I’m no help there, sorry!! But any time you see a sale at your local liquor store, buy a little here and there… so you’re not hit with a big lump cost closer to the wedding day! Or if you have a Joe Canal’s or similar sort of alcohol superstore… they have good prices and often have sales! 🙂

Signs should be quick and easy and fun! – recruit your bridesmaids! Or family members! Not sure what your theme is, but it could be cute to have different handwriting on each if you’re doing a rustic kind of theme. Or if you want them to be the same, have an assembly line – one person writes, another decorates, glues, etc. any kind of finishing touches. 🙂

Wedding bands may be quick and easy, too, depending on what you want and if you are able to find your size in stores! Even if you can’t find it in your size, most stores will let you return it or resize it within a few weeks anyway – even if you need to buy a bigger size just to put it on your fingers for the ceremony! Then put it away safely till you can get it resized. 🙂

Jewelry should be fun too! Make an awesome date with your bridesmaids, go shopping, have lunch, laugh a lot.  That’s what I did.. my necklace wasn’t PERFECT for my dress, but I LOVE IT sooo much because of all the memories that went into finding it with my friends!

Favors – I posted in your other thread about favors, and I’ll say it here… honey sticks! 🙂 Soooo cheap, so easy to put together, and SO stinking cute! Plus, perfect for your May spring wedding!

Low priority: Tuxes can wait – we ordered ours 1.5 months in advance. Alterations also can wait a little bit. Card box can wait till you get more important stuff out of the way.  Even if you wait till the last second, Michael’s and AC Moore have beautiful ones for sale ready-made! With guest books and ring pillows to match (if you haven’t gotten those yet!).

 

My DH was the same way with planning… easily stressed, frustrated even more easily, and my anxiety over everything totally made it worse.  When it comes to getting your fiance’s help, my advice to you is make a list of things you want HIM to do, but only give it to him one piece at a time! Leave him out of anything creative or artsy, because I dont’ think most men care about those kinds of details… but for example, tell him, “okay, this week please help with some research into a DJ… if you can find a list of 3 or so that are within our budget, give me the list, and I’ll look closet, compare, read reviews, etc. and narrow it down!”  That way he does the bulk of it, but he won’t be stressed about being responsible for the ultimate decision, or thinking he has to get ALL of it done RIGHT AWAY.  Set deadlines, divvy up responsiblities and goals. 🙂

 

You’ll be fine!! 😀 Just breathe, and relax. And make lists! Hehe.

Post # 5
Member
8592 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

First thing I would do is hire those vendors!  Do those first because you want someone reserved.

Do you have a list of what to do month-by-month?  I made one of those and that helped me a lot. 

You might look into your liquor permit ASAP, just in case there are some things you need to get it.  You don’t need to buy liquor until a few weeks before (I’d wait until you get your RSVPs back).

If you’re making invites I’d get started on those, but they don’t have to go out until 6-8 weeks before.  So you’ve got 2-3 months to make them. 

Wedding bands and tuxes can be done now, but you can also do them 4 or 5 weeks before and still be fine.

I didn’t really have any help from DH, I just did it all on my own mostly!  I had a lot of downtime at work to look through things though.

Post # 6
Member
6270 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

relax.  make a list of everything you need to do and assign deadlines.

mark the highest priority items, do them first.

then work your way down.

set a goal for what you want to want to accomplish by when.

 

i planned my wedding in 8 months.  first 2 months were busy and last 2 months were busy.  not too much going on in between.  i was so organized that when the government was shutdown for the 3 weeks leading up to my wedding, i had nothing to do. 

 

Post # 7
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@MsGinkgo:  Keeping sane is definitely a trick… Haha. It’s not easy, but just keep reminding yourself that it’ll all work out! 🙂 It has to! And the pieces that don’t work out exactly as planned… well, who cares? You’ll still be married to the love of your life, and you’ll still have a beautiful wedding surrounded by love and wonderful people! 🙂

Post # 8
Hostess
30304 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@MsGinkgo:  Aww, sweetie! I’m totally late to the game here, but I just wanted to pop in and say I’ll second the comment on lists! Definitely lists. Oh, and take breaks in your planning – it’s okay to take a day here and there to yourself, in which you do no wedding planning whatsoever. I promise your head will be clearer the next day! 🙂 Hugs!

Post # 10
Hostess
30304 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@MsGinkgo:  Don’t worry though! When we were planning our wedding and 4.5 months out, I was ridiculously stressed. I needed to listen to my own advice LOL!! 😀

Post # 11
Member
362 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@lovelove1028:  Wow!! What a great bunch of awesome tips! I’m totally using some of those ideas he he! (I’m also getting married this May, and I just don’t like wedding planning at all!) Your ideas and tips are great! Thanks!

Post # 12
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@soupir:  Glad it was helpful!! 😀 Lists are soo important! 

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