Post # 1
lets start off with, my dad and I have a great relationship and I have always been a daddy’s girl. I have never really fought or been mad at my dad.
well tonight 5 night before my wedding…. I am truly upset with him.
My mother and father have been divorced for 7 years. My mother has since passed on. In that 7 years my dad has never brought another women home to meet me. Nor has he ever mention to me about having a girlfriend.
So my dad called me this evening to inform me that he is bringing a date to the wedding. an old friend he hasnt talked to in 30 years! I said to him it very close to the wedding to be adding guest and I already had my seating chart complete. Also reminding him as the father of the bride he would be very busy and not have time to entertain a date.
it stresses me out just thinking of my dad having a strange women with him at my wedding. Is this selfish of me? I want my dad to have a friend and partner. I just think its not approproate first date setting!
I don’t even know what to say to him.
Post # 3
@Dolcebabe: I don’t think the FOB is all that busy, and it’s not up to you to determine whether he’ll be too busy. Leave that argument out.
But, 5 days before the wedding is way too close – all numbers are meant to be finalised and it’ll cost extra money. If he’s paying, I’d sigh and let him do it – just add an extra seat to his table, it’s his money. But if you’re paying – no way Jose, RSVP date has passed.
Post # 4
@Dolcebabe: You’re going to hear a lot of people tell you that you are being selfish for not wanting him to have a date & that you’ll barely even notice the guest.
However, I’m not one of them.
I think it’s really odd to invite a practical stranger to your daughters wedding as your last minute date. Especially when the bride has never seen him with women besides her late mother.
Yes, sorry hun. I feel ya. This is really rude & I would be pissed too. I would just tell him no.
Post # 5
@Dolcebabe: I kind of think you are being selfish. Did you stop to think that this might be a hard and emotional event for your father given your mother passed away? Just because they were divorced does not mean that he stopped caring about her. He might need a friend there to help get him through the day.
Post # 6
I think that’s really unfair of him. Talk to him about how you feel, explain that you’d love to meet her or go on a double date – after the wedding.
Post # 7
@Dolcebabe: your dad should be able to have a plus 1 even if it is awkward for you. Idk why he brought it up last minute, definitely annoying
Post # 8
You will have some no-shows, almost guaranteed, So don’t worry about the count.
Post # 9
@Dolcebabe: unless he really needs this person to be there I’d say no. Let him take her out somewhere else other than your wedding. if he really needs her there, then just let him bring her.
I don’t think you’re being selfish though, your dad has had plenty of time to bring this up.
Post # 10
Do you have any tables with an extra seat open? just sit her there. You already finished your seating chart, I wouldn’t change anything but ti fit her in wherever.
Post # 11
An extra setting at the table wont throw it off by that much. You will probably have no shows anyway. I totally see why it bothers you but I just think in tbe greater pictue of things to worry about its a blip. As long as hes clear she has no role I dont see what the problem is.
Post # 12
Slip an extra chair next to him at his table and be done with it. While it is last minute, he is your dad and would like to bring a guest. If it is something that simple to help him fully enjoy the day, I am would let him. He might be having a harder time being alone on your day than he is letting on.
Post # 13
I’m not so much worried about guest numbers. I know we will have enough food and I do have open seats. but he wants her seated at the family table. which is already full and I will have to move my grandma or auntie to accomatde her. I think this all just hurt me, the principle of it. I do feel a bit selfish but I do feel he was a bit unfair throwing this on me at this timing.
Post # 14
@Dolcebabe: Have you expressed to him that this bothers you or are you silently suffering & angry with him?
Post # 15
I think you should let her come, but as an act of defiance, do not set her at the family table.
“Well, if you would have told me earlier, I may have been able to arrange it. But I can’t change it now, or Grandma will be left to sit all by herself. And I don’t think that’s very fair to Grandma.”