(Closed) "5 Worst Wedding Gifts"

posted 4 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
2613 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@IzzyBear:  This list is really snotty and basically boils down to – “how dare you get the couple anything they haven’t picked out for themselves!!!

People on the receiving end of other’s generosity need to check themselves.  

Post # 4
Member
3943 posts
Honey bee

I sort of agree, except with the first one. i dont think cash can get lost any easier than a check can. We actually appreciated the cash because the bank wasn’t open on Sunday and we left very early Monday morning for our honeymoon so we brought it along for some extra spending money.

Post # 6
Member
1332 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I agree with #4, getting naughty clothing from a family member is really odd in my opinion.

Post # 7
Member
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Bostongrl25:  a check can be lost as easily as cash, but you can write another check. If cash is lost, it’s just gone.

Post # 8
Member
1755 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

#1 Cash – Mixed.  While I think that for safety a check makes the most sense, especially for a larger wedding.  I think it’s also nice for a couple to have a little extra cash for their honeymoon.  I’d say if the couple is leaving directly after the wedding on their honeymoon, perhaps cash or gift them with a check the week before.

#2 Non-Registry Surprises – Yes & No.  While I think that it’s impractical to gift a couple with fancy crystal candlesticks (unless you know it’s their sort of thing), I think sometimes non-registry gifts can be awesome.  If someone gifted us with a couple of restaurant gift cards to our favorite restaurant or gifted me with a cookbook and special new casserole pan, I’d be thrilled.  One wedding I gifted a dog crazy couple with a dog themed scrapbook and paraphenalia – it was their favorite gift and they hadn’t registered for it.  Non-registry gifts are fine if you really know the couple and choose wisely.

#3 – Home Decor – This boils down to how well you know them and if you’re matching their tastes.  If you know a couple loves a particular artist and you get them a piece that’s skewed towards that or you know they love dark exotic items from Pier One, that’s fine.  On the other hand, getting old fashioned heavy silver photo frames for a couple that’s into a sleek modern style, not so great.

#4 – Awkward Presents.  When in doubt of a gift, don’t.  Simply don’t.  It’s only funny if everyone laughs.  Or sweet if it’s meaningful to the couple.  Better to hit the registry than something inappropriate.

#5 – Honeymoon Excursion – Depends on the item and the couple.  Mr. C & I are going to NYC for part of our honeymoon and planning to see several shows and close friends and family know exactly which favorite ones.  We’d be thrilled if someone gifted us with tickets.  On the other hand, we’re soooo not the couples massage sort or the boating sort.  If you know a couple’s tastes and plans, I think giving them a special excursion that was flexable on date or even asking them before booking could make an awesome gift!  just have to be certain of the couple before attempting a gift like that.

Post # 9
Member
1193 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@Zhabeego:  +1

Seriously, there is so much drama surrounding wedding gifts.  “We just want cash!” “How can we get people to pay for our honeymoon?” “We got a gift from my aunt/cousin/Joe Blow that is horrible, what do we say in the note?”

Whatever happened to people just saying “thank you”, graciously, to any gift they get instead of trying to tell people what to buy them.  It’s just so trashy to me.  People often talk about how etiquette is a “suggestion”… but honestly, manners shouldn’t be.

Post # 10
Member
4442 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@IzzyBear:  The worst thing in my opinion is customized home decor.  As the people clearly didn’t get an idea of my taste from looking at the wedding registry, hell maybe they didn’t even look at it.

 

SIL bought us a canvas printed with woodgrain, our names, wedding date, etc.  Aunts and Uncles went in on this metal wire “live, laugh, love” thing with name and dates as well.  Grandparents hand made a cross… we’re atheists.

Post # 12
Hostess
11178 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

Most of those are arguable IF the person knows me well enough.

That being said cash is absoutely 100% the BEST gift you can ever give someone regardless of the special occassion. I highly doubt any of my friends have left an event saying “that tacky bitch gave me too much money?”

Post # 13
Member
360 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@Zhabeego:

@stuckinwonderland:

+ a million. A gift is a gift and it’s the thought that counts, period.  I can’t believe my eyes when I read some of the threads about gifts

Post # 15
Member
341 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’ll agree that couples should show gratitude for *any* gift.  But that doesn’t mean that I’m going to put the thing you bought me on display in my house if it isn’t my taste.  Or that I’m going to hang on to the fondue set you bought me when I have a tiny kitchen with no storage room.

I consider lists like this to be well intended– to guide people toward gift choices that will be appreciated in the long term. 

If you give me *any* gift, I’m grateful for the thought.  But if you show up a year later asking about the crystal clock you bought me when my whole house is in danish modern… well…

Post # 16
Member
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

#1) Agree to a point. I only agree to the point of giving CASH at the wedding itself, and ONLY because there was a scandal not too long ago about a hired security guard who was caught stealing cash from the couples’ card box. Who KNOWS how much money he’s stolen in the past, and he ONLY took cash (not cheques or gift cards). It is likely this won’t happen… but this is the only reason I agree with this to a point.

 

#2) Disagree. As an adult I feel you should be allowed to give whatever gift you want to give. You are the one giving the gift, after all. Yes, while it is NICE to buy them something they asked for, I do not think of registries as an exclusive list. (That said, I only buy from registries or give a gift card to one of their registry sites. However, I will not be the least bit annoyed by getting a non-registry gift.)

 

#3) Disagree for the same reason above. A gift is a gift is a gift.

 

#4) To be a hypocrite and contradict my previous statement, I must say I agree with this. Baby clothes and personal clothing/items should NOT be given as a wedding gift. When/If the couple decides to have a baby, they will likely announce it. Then would be the time to give them baby clothes. The same goes for “personal” clothing and items. 1 – What size is the bride? X-Small? Small? Medium? Large? Does she feel comfortable wearing these things? Does her husband find these things attractive? (Some men, believe it or not, do not see the appeal behind lingerie). Oh and PERSONAL TOYS, no no no! That is something that should be purchased by the couple WHEN AND IF they decide they want to bring them in to their relationship! GACK! (Still though, if you DO get these, just write a lovely -but limited detail- thank you note, and move on.)

 

#5) Disagree. As long as you know the couple WILL be available for/would make use of your gift, I don’t see why this is a no-no. My parents “surprised” us with a spa package (they only told me because I was talking about booking a spa day… so my mom had to “stop me” lol). However, only his parents and my parents know where we’re going for the honeymoon so its not like guests will be able to give us anything for the honeymoon!

 

 (I wanted to add that I do not think that there is any harm/shame in returning a gift that you will NEVER use… I wouldn’t make a big spectacle out of it, and if asked outright, I would be honest… it is not a good thing to lie about it…)

 

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