(Closed) 6 months to go…I’m freaking out a little

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

no

Post # 4
Member
3004 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I don’t think it’s anything to panic about, I just feel like it’s probably just the usual case of cold feet. You are in a moment of high stress, this whole thing is new to you, and although you have found the love of your life you are going to be moving on to the next step in your lives together.

It’ll be ok! It’s so exciting! Hope things feel better for you soon.

Post # 5
Member
1986 posts
Buzzing bee

It’s normal, it’s even got a name! Cold Feet. It’s ok to be anxious about such a big change!

The thing is, however, it isn’t all that big of a change. Yes, your name will be different, but will you really be any more commited than you are now? Marriage doesn’t make or break your relationship, the 2 of you do. Everything you have together now, will be the same that you have after you say I Do, only shinier for a little while ๐Ÿ˜€

Post # 6
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2011

No, but I’m a little different. I’m living with my FI (about a year now) and can’t wait to get the husband/wife title. I clearly don’t mind living with him before we’re married, but sometimes I don’t like telling older generations that I live with him. I’m also a bit different in that I still haven’t decided if I’m taking his last name. Have you thought about keeping your name or using both?

Post # 7
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2011

No, but I’m a little different. I’m living with my FI (about a year now) and can’t wait to get the husband/wife title. I clearly don’t mind living with him before we’re married, but sometimes I don’t like telling older generations that I live with him. I’m also a bit different in that I still haven’t decided if I’m taking his last name. Have you thought about keeping your name or using both?

Post # 8
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2011

No, but I’m a little different. I’m living with my FI (about a year now) and can’t wait to get the husband/wife title. I clearly don’t mind living with him before we’re married, but sometimes I don’t like telling older generations that I live with him. I’m also a bit different in that I still haven’t decided if I’m taking his last name. Have you thought about keeping your name or using both?

Post # 9
Member
988 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

Completely normal to feel anxious about an upcoming marriage!  Great to hear you say ‘I want these things’ – this will help to remember when you feel the anxiety. 

Sometimes I still pinch myself that I got to marry the man of my dreams.  ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 10
Member
638 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@menobride:  Yes, yes, yes!!!! I’m 37 and never been married, and it just feels like a HUGE adjustment. I think some of the younger women on this site may not understand what it feels like to be making this transition after a decade or two of being completely on your own. I’ve been engaged for 5 months now, and have been having major internal struggles with all of these things. On top of that, I just moved in with my fiance and may be downgrading my career due to a layoff, and yep, lot’s of craziness going on. ๐Ÿ™‚

I just downloaded the book “Emotionally Engaged” which talks about these feelings of saying goodbye to your singlehood and all the emotions that go along with it. I highly recommend it!

I think there is this feeling that this “should” be the happiest time of our lives, and any uncertainty, fear, guilt, anger or other negative feelings make us feel as though something is majorly wrong, when in fact, in a lot of cases, it is the normal processing of this rite of passage.

Hugs to you and know you are NOT alone. ๐Ÿ™‚

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