6 years and still waiting…

posted 3 years ago in Proposals
Post # 2
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

jesais:  We have a similar history, I was in a similar situation.  I’m sorry that you are dealing with this.  I dated my FI for 6 1/2 years before we got engaged, and he’s 29 and I’m 28.  For years he knew I wanted to marry him, and he would tell me he wanted it too but then nothing would happen.  It’s so hard to feel like you are putting your life “on hold” because you desperately want to take the next step and he’s taking his sweet time.  Hang in there.  I don’t have any advice for you other than to keep yourself busy with activities that make you happy and don’t always include him (I took a few more road trips with my girlfriends, signed up and ran a lot of races, found a running group and made a lot of new friends)  My fiance knew what I wanted, and it’s important to let your boyfriend know what you want.  It sounds like you already have.  Just try to stay positive and remember that you love him and want to spend the rest of your life with him for a reason!  It will all work out, I hope it happens soon for you.  Did he say why he wants to wait until his 30’s?

Post # 3
Member
3637 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I think you need to have an open discussion about when you actually want to become parents. Work backwards: do you want your first kid by 31? Ok, subtract 9months, subtract 1 year of trying to conceive, subtract 1-2 years of marriage before kids, subtract 1.5 year engagement = getting engaged now. 

Often ladies in these boards talk to their SOs about when they want kids and the guys says, oh, when I’m 30, but I’m not ready for marriage yet. When the Bee points out to them that 30 is only 2 years away they quickly realise that they need to be more realistic. 

Post # 4
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Everdeen:  That is a great point!  I know a few of my guy friends that say “I want to have kids when I’m 30” but they don’t realize that is only 2-3 years away!  

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