Post # 1
So. Like many of the bees on this board, I am experiencing moderate frustration with occasional bouts of a very distilled kind of anger.
FI’s aunt and uncle RSVPed yes to our October wedding. Great. Then, a few weeks later, Fiance recieved an email explaining that while they RSVPed yes, they aren’t sure if they can actually come because (drumroll, please) the Cincinnati Reds *might* make the playoffs this year, and if they do, the game will take the taco on the day we wed. FI’s uncle topped the email off with my personal favorite remark, “I’m sure you understand that this would be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity!”. Um…you mean kind of like YOUR NIECE’S WEDDING? They explained that they would be happy to let us know whether they would attend, a week before the wedding. A week. A %$#*&! WEEK. So, now we are in this awkward place where we have to find a polite way of telling them they can either give us an answer now, or we will simply not include them in our plans. We have to turn in numbers to vendors, make our seating plan, etc.
Anyone else experiencing this insane degree of selfish rudeness? Do they think we pulled an RSVP date out of our rectums, just for sillies? *insert anger here*
Post # 3
i’m sorry but i couldn’t help but laugh at this! they are being absolutely ridiculous and you should not be afraid to tell them in no uncertain terms that they have to make a decision now, or they will be left out of the final count.
btw, cincinnati probably will make the playoffs this year…so hopefully you can count them out since they don’t think your wedding is a priority in their lives anyways.
Post # 4
SOOO sorry your have to go that. I’d be fuming mad too. You can say Kudos to the Reds, but unfortunately you need a final count by the end of the week to give to your vendor and need to know ASAP. and top the email off to your uncle by repeating what he said “Im sure you can understand that this is a once in a lifetime moment”
Post # 5
In their defense, the Red have been REALLY terrible for a REALLY long time.
How close is your Fiance to this Aunt/Uncle? I’d let him make the call. The truth is most people are still trying to finalize a guest list the week before the wedding.
Post # 6
Sigh! The RSVP rant… I think every bride deals with this but man, that is one crappy excuse!!! I don’t blame you one bit for being angry.
Is there anyway you can assign them to a seat that wouldn’t matter much if it was empty? Not sure how big of a guest list you are expecting but there are usually a couple no-shows if it’s a sizable crowd so if your aunt/uncle don’t show it wouldn’t be too bad…and if they do, and they’re unhappy with the seat then you can politely explain that you had no choice since they didn’t offer a full RSVP. =P
Just an idea… Hope it helps!
Post # 7
OMG I would be furious! How is that game more important than your wedding?!?!?! Like the poster above said, just politely tell them you’ll need a final answer by your RSVP deadline, not after and see what happens.
Post # 8
Oh wow. I’m sorry. We have been moving our date around trying to find the best time. First we picked, without thinking about it, Memorial/Indy 500 weekend, then my sister and two cousins graduation weekend, then Father’s Day weekend! Pure craziness. Not only that but my parents are big boaters and are giving us grief about cutting into their boating time since it will be on a weekend.
Post # 9
WOW. Thats pretty crazy. Sorry they suck!!
Post # 10
Personally I would e-mail a reply that of course I understand, but unfortunately the head count must be submitted way before then for the venue(s). So I must assume the answer is no and that I would love to get together for a celebratory dinner AFTER the playoffs are over and we have returned from the honeymoon and things have settled down a bit.
Post # 11
WOW. o_o That is… actually really inconsiderate of them. I would just politely say that you’ll have to count them out because of the reasons you mentioned, unless they can say they’ll be going 100%. It’d be pretty ridiculous of them to get mad at you for that considering they’re the ones who are planning to miss out on their niece’s wedding for a baseball game on TV. That clearly shows the event isn’t THAT important to them.
I’d be really insulted if a family member told me a baseball game trumps my wedding. They’d be better off just telling me they may not be able to make it and not mention why lol.
Post # 12
@LGenz: Most people are trying to finalize the guest list a week before the wedding? THAT I have never heard! How would one know the number of seats for the ceremony or the head count for the reception?
Post # 13
>.< Seriously. Not cool at all.
Post # 14
I was finalizing mine the week before the wedding. Two days before 3 of my “friends” ditched and we asked another couple to come…who didnt say yes or not till about 2 days before the wedding. It happens.
Post # 15
@bluespurrs: Well this is only in my experience, but all my friends/Co-workers have had to chase at least ONE couple down right until the last minute. Unless you’re renting the EXACT amount of chairs you need for the ceremony you should be able to accomodate a couple stragglers.
I made a joke, but that is seriously crazy that they thought that was an acceptable reason and also thought it was OK to share with you.
Post # 16
I had a ton of guest list re-arranging the week before the wedding. From my cousin who changed his RSVP THREE times (it was yes, then no, then only him and not his wife, then both), to my friend who requested that she bring her boyfriend THE WEEK BEFORE (I said yes, b/c my cousin had just canceled, then he didn’t come and she never told me until the rehearsal dinner), to my uncle and his family (5 people) that told me “We have to see if we can get flights” and who I wasn’t sure about until they actually showed up, to my other cousin that brought a random boyfriend.
But. Our reception had no seating chart, so I wasn’t changing all of that at least. It’s not meant personally, but it can be hard not to take it that way.