Post # 1
OMG! Okay. This has to do with FI’s father. (I’m not considering him my FIL; FI’s uncle is my FIL) Okay. i’m sure some of you have read some of my posts that FI’s parents are divorced. His mother drinks….would “a drunk” be too much to say? But I really like his mom…even if she is loud. FI’s father is nothing but a good-for-nothing, burned out bum. I’m sorry, but that’s what he is. He is a BAD burn out. His family have pretty muched blamed Fiance & his sister for why their father “goes crazy” and “gets his meds mixed up” (that is just him getting his meds mixed up with drugs)
Fiance and my Future Sister-In-Law have pretty much gave up on their father and his family.
But I will say that what REALLY hurt my Future Sister-In-Law is that her daddy’s family, and her daddy didn’t show up to her high school graduation this year. Their daddy called two days before graduation to ask where to park at the high school. She was SO excited to see her daddy. He didn’t show up. None of that family did. He just called to see if she was going to continue to get her child support checks, or if he was going to get the money back. (FI’s father had signed his “rights” over to FI’s aunt & uncle for FI’s sister.)
Future Sister-In-Law was SO upset that her daddy didn’t show up. I know it hurt her. And their daddy just ignored them, and wouldn’t talk to them when he saw them in public.
Well, i was taking Fiance to physical therapy yesterday (Oh yah, he extremely sprained his ankle last month, and chipped some of the bone) He told me that his fathers family called his sister (FSIL) Monday morning, before she left to start her very first day of college. The kid was a nervous wreck as it is about school. NOW, they call and tell her that their father has checked himself back into a rehab, and is getting married TWO DAYS before Fiance and I! To who? We don’t know. We know that the woman is from a county away.
I’m am SO aggrivated at that man in SO many ways. I don’t think that it bothers me that he’s supposedly is getting married two days before us. I honestly don’t want him, his mom, or his sisters at the wedding. I’m just SO afraid that they will do something stupid at the ceremony.
I’m sorry. I needed to vent. I know that post made no sense what so ever. Just thanks for listening.
Post # 3
Wow. Your poor FSIL! That is really rough. I wouldn’t want him there eitherl Hopefully being fresh out of rehab makes him check his bad behavior at the door. Unless you are secretly hoping he doesn’t show up. I’m so sorry you and your Fiance have to deal with this. How awful! Ugh. Is there a family member that can keep everyone in line?
Post # 4
Wow – hugs to you and Fiance. That’s hard. Just remember that Fiance father is not the most reliable person, so this may not even happen. Take a deep breath and tell Fiance to say “that’s my family, it’s not me”. You guys will be fine and no matter who tries to steal your thunder, you’ll be married and have each other forever. THAT’s what matters. Hang in there.
Post # 5
FI’s uncle (that I consider my FFIL; and his best man), my 2 cousins (who are groomsmen), FI’s stepfather and my father will be watching. They said that they won’t let anything happen.
And the whole checking into rehab. He’s been there many times. And he obviously doesn’t have self control.
The town that I’m from, the people with FI’s last name have a bad rep. Even the nice ones can’t catch a break! All because a certain few (including his dad, and his dads two brothers) I told Fiance that if and when we have children, I want them to attend the school that he went to because they don’t have the “bad rep” there. (His school is in a neighboring county) I love living in a small town, but geez! I the only thing I hate is that everyone is in your business! lol
Post # 6
Sometimes it takes more than 1 time to clean up…somebody has to hit rock bottom before they have the desire to get clean. Maybe he hasn’t hit it yet? There’s hope.
Post # 7
Fiance told me last night that his father didn’t go to rehab. So I guess I have to listen to more “mumbling” when he comes into my place of work. He is that burned out, he mumbles, or gets to the point where he can’t talk but breath really heavy. FI’s uncle called the law on him once, but only to help him. They followed the cop car by a few minutes behind. By time they got to the hospital, he had done checked himself out.
I really hate that Fiance and his sister came from a broken home, and parents that abuse something. Fiance says that he sees it as a blessing in disguise. He has no desire to do none of that. He hates it seeing people on drugs. It makes him mad. He is one of the three first boys in his family to finish high school. His sister is a brillant girl, and she’s going to college. She’s the first to go to college in their family. She wants to go into nursing. Fiance wants to be a loving husband & father (that last one is bit further down the road) They want to be what their parents weren’t. And honestly, I think that if it wasn’t for their aunt & uncle (my FILs), they wouldn’t be who they are today.
So I guess really, all is left to do is hope & pray that their parents (mainly their dad) will see the light, and want to try and get better. I really hope so.
Post # 8
*hugs* I’m really sorry you’re having to deal with all this at the same time you are trying to plan the biggest event of your life! Whatever you Fiance decides to do, I’m sure you’ll be really supportive and really, that’s all you can do right now. Good luck!
Post # 9
Bad parents can happen to good people and it makes life really, really hard. I left my own parents when I was fifteen and became a dependent of the court and now I have no contact with them, which is really much, much better in my situation. Sometimes you just have to keep toxic people out of your lives when they can’t contribute positively. I wish you, your Fiance, and Future Sister-In-Law the best.