- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
Hello fellow Bees! I have been married for about 10 months or so now, and am not very active these days because there’s just not a lot here for me. But, looking back on things, I figured maybe I’d offer these few words of wisdom that I wish I’d had back when I was planning my wedding. See, when DH and I were newly engaged and talking weddings, we wanted something small and simple. We’re not fancy people, we didn’t want all the expensive fuss that some people do. When I found the Bee, I found a LOT of great advice, links, etc. that I am eternally grateful for. With this, came some bad things too. Seeing everyone plan their big affairs, I wondered if I should be doing something more for our big day? Was I wrong for wearing a simple cotton dress from a regular online shop instead of some fancy number made by a designer I’d never heard of? Was our wedding going to be ‘tacky’ because it wasn’t catered and featuring a full waitstaff? It’s hard to see huge beautiful weddings everyday and not feel inadequate about yours, that’s just the way it is. When it was said and done, our small backyard BBQ wedding was EXACTLY what we wanted, and we loved every second of it. It wasn’t for everyone, but it was us and I’m glad I stuck to our decisions to have something small instead of caving in to the bigger blingier affair. Here’s a few helpful hints to remember from now until you say ‘I Do’!
1. Love your wedding, embrace it for what it is…YOUR WEDDING DAY!! It doesn’t matter if you spent a million dollars and imported rare delicacies or if you spent $500 and ate hot dogs in a barn (just don’t tell people it’s a million dollar fairytale castle wedding if you’re serving hot dogs in a barn LOL). It’s the day you got married and began your life together. As long as you enjoyed yourself, and your guests were happy, that is all that matters.
2. Yes, people are going to judge your wedding, they will no matter what you do. And that’s OK. If there is someone in your life who you feel is going to look down upon you for whatever decision you make, you will never please them. Please yourselves, and you’ll be happy. I guarantee you that even if you have the most hideous wedding in the world, the people that matter will tell you that it was wonderful and beautiful no matter what.
3. The Bee is a great resource, but remember that none of these people know you personally. So if you fall in love with a pair of shoes that everyone on the Bee hates, wear them anyway. They have their own tastes, their own ideas and their own weddings.
4. No matter what someone gives you as a gift, write a polite and heartfelt Thank You note for it, even if you hate it.
5. Your wedding is a happy day, but it’s only 1 day. No one is going to drop their lives for you to have the perfect day, and it is unreasonable to expect them too.
6. Frienships last longer than weddings (and sometimes marriages), keep this in mind. If there is someone in your life important enough for you to want to include on your big day, the friendship is not going to be worth ending over an argument over dresses or hairstyles. Be a fair bride, listen to the people in your life instead of brushing them off…they’ll tell you things you may not want to hear but it will ensure that the life AFTER the wedding is still filled with happy friendships and warm memories.
I think it’s easy to lose sight of everything amidst the chaos that is planning a wedding, no matter what kind you plan. Just don’t let it consume you!