- 3 years ago
I wanted to offer a different perspective to some of you other waiting bees. My boyfriend and I have been seriously discussing marriage for about a year and a half but I’ve only seriously been waiting a few months. We spent a lot of that time analyzing our relationship, deciding if marriage was the right step. We’ve both been married before (very briefly) and didn’t want a repeat of that experience. I’m not a traditional Waiting Bee in that I’m not waiting for him to propose, I am waiting to propose. When we started looking at rings boyfriend said he wanted one which led to us trying to find him a ring. I’m definitely the more dominant personality and he and I thought it would be fun if I proposed. I know he plans on proposing to me too, but after I do.
I know my ring is in and that he has it so once I’m engaged I might have a wait for my ring, but I have had his ring for 3 months! I guess my perspective to all you ladies is that proposing to someone, even when you know the answer is a huge thing to do! Google proposing to someone and see these guys are all anxious and just want to do it the right way. I remember waiting in the traditional sense before my first marriage and I must say we ladies seriously do not give our men enough credit. So knowing both sides of waiting I can tell you they are different emotions but similar in that they can be hard to deal with.
I have spent 3 months still thinking about proposing and is it the right thing for right now? How will he react? What if I mess the whole thing up? What if he hates the ring (he picked it)? I read somewhere that it is one of the most anxiety filled times in a man’s life. I can tell you it is! I was even afraid to tell my parents and my friends. It is a different level of commitment in that instead of just knowing, we are proclaiming this outright, even if it won’t change the actual relationship.
That being said, I’m proposing tonight. I have the whole thing planned and I’m scared to death! Wish me luck ladies and please cut your men some slack they are dealing with their own emotions right now and their version of waiting is just as difficult as yours is.