- 5 years ago
- Wedding: June 2013
Hello Bees. I’m new to the site and a first-time poster. I’m not exactly sure of what I want to say–I guess I just need to talk. My apologies in advance if I start to ramble. 🙂
My boyfriend (still not used to the “f” word) and I have been together for 6+ years. Marriage was never a priority for me and he still harbors some gun-shyness due to the very painful breakup of his first marriage. We’ve had a rough summer and I even considered moving out of the home we share; we are both a little emotionally immature and pretty crappy communicators. But somehow we’ve made it passed all the drama, started practicing using our grown-up words and four weeks ago he presented me with his grandmother’s engagement ring. He wants to wait to get married until he finishes grad school in May of next year and then the plan is to elope to Vegas and have a fun, goofey stress-free Elvis wedding.
My problem is that I’ve been sucked into the Bride Trap and feel a little sad that he’s not all giddy and drunk on love like the guys in the engagement photos on Pinterest appear to be. My FI doesn’t get excited about much of anything (he’s more the brooding artist type). Literally, there was nothing to his proposal–he just asked. No preparations, no bended knee, nothing. I do suspect most of the Pinterest guys aren’t out singing from the rooftops or jumping on couches everyday either. Everything is pretty much the same, except that my finger is very sparkly now. 🙂 I just need to get over the romantic ideals that have never been my reality.
I also feel like I should be busy making arrangements but there is nothing to plan. And boy am I a planner. We could conceivably set a date in April, have trip arrangements made in two weeks and be ready to go. Another downside to not having a traditional wedding (not that I want one) is that I’ll miss out on all the fun girly stuff. So that’s where you come in. I need to live vicariously through you with your dress shopping, cake tasting, color choosing and all the rest of it. Feel free to share your stories, especially if your FI is an emotional dud. So bring on the girly stuff!