Post # 1
So the BF has asked me to go ring shopping tomorrow (the poor thing said he’s felt overwhelmed and freaked out that he would get something I didn’t like and would never tell him). Last night we were chatting about our diamond adventure and our expectations…..Well not surprisingly, I told him I was worried that he was going to wait months to propose now because having it be a surprise is important to him. So I pointed out 2 things:
1. That will literally be torture to withhold diamonds from a girl who has already seen them (duh!)
2. What time of year a guy proposes determines what time of year we’ll have the wedding (or how long the engagement will be)
Well #2 seemed to be a real eye-opener. He said never in a million years would he think about what time of year to propose based on when the wedding would be. He’s had 2 friends propose over Christmas- Resulting in one long, 18 month engagement and one short, 7 month engage- Because the girls wanted to get married in the summer! Makes sense to us Bees, but our men might never think that way. Since it’s July now and we want to have an outdoor wedding, he got the hint that he shouldn’t wait until winter time to propose. Anyways, just thought it might be a useful tip for those Bees who are *so darn close* to the proposal 🙂
Post # 3
I second this one! When my now husband started casually mentioning rings and weddings and such, I let him know that it would be nice if I had a year to plan. He didn’t really get that we needed that long to plan a wedding (and sometimes you don’t), but for the amount of people we were having and where/when I wanted to have it, he would need to take that into consideration. I think it helped move him along :o)
Post # 4
I did that too. Many guys have no CLUE how long it takes to plan a wedding. It’s like, in their minds the wedding just magically gets put together all by itself within weeks. My guy kept mentioning (on his own) that he wanted to be married within a year, but I knew he hadn’t actively started taking the steps needed to propose. He was SHOCKED when I told him I’d need 9 months to a year to plan. That seemed to light a fire under his butt and I’m (goddess willing) expecting a proposal any day now!
Now it’s time to have the “birds and the bees” talk, since he’s talking about having kids in a year and I still don’t even have a ring….
Post # 5
I told my boyfriend a long time ago I wanted 2 years to plan a wedding (live in a major city where things book up quickly), so he needed to take that into consideration as to when he wanted to propose/get engaged. We will hopefully be engaged very soon and then have the wedding in the spring/summer of 2012. Which is perfect timing for us.
Post # 6
@MsCubs: Are you in Chicago? If so – Do you know where you’re going to look at rings? – just curious.
Post # 7
@flutterbi: I actually live in CA but we’ll probably get married in Chicago since I grew up there. Sorry I’m not very helpful! 🙁
Post # 8
This is what I had to tell my FI (Bf at the time) also. He was going to wait until we bought a house to purpose. But I explained we would need 1 year max but more like 2 years to save up for it. So he went ahead and purposed a month after the talk.
Post # 9
@MsCubs: That’s great you talked to him about not leaving you hanging indefinitely after the ring purchase!
Regaring point #2: I’m kind of bummed becuase I live in a major city too….I’d need at least a year to plan and I want a fall wedding. And this whole wedding logistics nightmare thing that I keep hearing about is making me think maybe I don’t want to move (into his place) and plan a wedding in the same year! And if he proposes after October we’d have to have almost a 2 year engagement. Such a headache…I can’t believe how clueless guys are sometimes.
Post # 10
God, I wish my FI would have thought of #1. He bought my ring when we had only been dating for four months…he proposed when we were together for eight months…we’ve now been together almost two years and still can’t have a wedding. We’ve decided to elope finally, but gosh, don’t guys have any common sense?