- 5 years ago
- Wedding: February 2014
I’ve been a lurker for sometime here and finally decided to post something.
I used to have what I thought of as a big group of friends since HS. Lately it seems that isnt the case.
We never had a falling out, fight, or anything. But about 2 years ago, around the time my mom died of breast cancer, things changed. I was obviously devastated from my loss, since I was close with my mom (my parents divorced when i was a kid and my mom pretty much raised me as a single mom. i have no siblings so i was quite bonded with her.) My dad and I talk every now and then since her passing, but its still nothing like the relationship i had with her.
Anyway, since I was grieving so hard, I rarely went out anymore. Rarely hung out with my friends, except for a few individually every once in awhile. But there were no more calls, invitations to parties, etc. and its not like they ever really tried to seek me out, either.
At the time, i didnt notice or even care bc i was grieving. And i guess i just figured things would eventually go back to normal.
They didnt. They got worse. I dont know if i can call these people “friends” anymore.
I feel horrible knowing that my wedding is around the corner, and that even though i am going to invite them, and even going to include a handful in my bridal party, it is basically all for show. Those relationships dont feel real to me.
I feel alone, hurt, and depressed by this. I feel like my FI is the only person i have in my life. its not like i have siblings to turn to either, so i feel all the more excluded.
Can anyone relate, or help advise on how to get through this? thanks bees.