Accommodation Dilema – What would you do?

posted 2 years ago in Travel
  • poll: What would you do?
    Thank dad's friend, but politely decline : (5 votes)
    17 %
    Thank dad's friend, offer to meet for lunch/coffee : (11 votes)
    37 %
    Accept the offer of a place to stay : (13 votes)
    43 %
    I have another opinion/suggestion : (1 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 2
    766 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    Ultimately, this is between you and your DH.  If you are comfortable, by all means stay with him.  Otherwise, I’d meet him for lunch (to be nice) and stay in a hotel.  

    Post # 4
    8680 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I don’t think I could stay with someone i’ve never met before, even if they were friends with one of my parents. That just seems really weird to me – but I’m a very cautious person and I never do anything “wild”.

    Post # 5
    12884 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I would be uncomfortable staying with someone I did not know and imposing on them.  I’d prefer to have my own space to feel free to come and go as I please and not having to tip toe around anyone or feel obligated to alter my schedule to spend time wiht or accomoate them since it it their place.  To me, that is not worth the savings.  I’d be ok with staying with my or dh’s family or friends, but not a stranger not knowing how the dynamics would play out.  It could potentially make for a uncomfortable 5 days if it didn’t work out.

    Post # 6
    4963 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    MsGinkgo:  I definitely wouldn’t be comfortable with this – especially since you’ve never met him.I would definitely go with the hotel. 

    Post # 7
    1202 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    The saying is “Guests, like fish, stink after 3 days”.  I’d find a lame excuse to spend 2-3 nights somewhere else (maybe you can find a hostel with a private room in your budget), then pass the rest of the time at your friend’s house to save money.   

    I dislike staying at a friend’s house and not being able to come and go as you please, finding host gifts, the who-pays-for-dinner awkwardness.    

    Post # 8
    2792 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Having done a lot of couch surf type travel, staying with someone like that has it’s perks, and it’s down sides. 


    It’s cheep

    It’s nice having someone who knows where the cool things are where you are visiting, great local resteraunts and hidden gems

    It’s most likely going to be nicer and more comfortable than a hotel


    You are going to be on your hosts schedule to a certain extent.  You won’t want to stay out late, and will likely feel bad for sleeping in if they work.

    Your host might intrude on your vactaion.

    Lack of privacy for you and your husband.


    The last one is what gets me now.  It was great when I was single to stay with people, even friends of friends.  I wouldn’t do it travling now with my husband.   We value our space too much. 

    Post # 10
    4638 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I wouldn’t feel comfortable with this arrangement and would much prefer a hotel.

    I’d thank him for being so gracious and take him to lunch or a coffee to show appreciation. Ask him advice about what to do and see in the area.

    I wouldn’t want him to feel snubbed, but I like my space and I LOOOVE hotels.

    Post # 12
    395 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    find out the accommodations first…where in London is he located, will you have your own bedroom and bathroom? who else will be there: kids, wide, girlfriend, etc. that was very nice of him to offer…and I’m all for a bargain!! I just might take him up on it if I were you. Or at least for two or three days. Then the other days you can get a nice hotel that DH approves of. 

    Post # 13
    4963 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    MsGinkgo:  Something else I just thought of – does he have a family? I feel like I would feel less awkward if he had a wife + kids, than if it was just a single man you were staying with. That’s something to also take into consideration. 

    Post # 14
    1566 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    MsGinkgo:  If you were going with AirBNB, often times you’re renting a room in someone’s home rather than a whole apartment. What’s different in this situation is that your parents have already vetted the people you’re staying with.

    I think it would be fun to stay with them, they can give you a lot of local knowledge and advice.

    Post # 15
    42135 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    MsGinkgo:  I would stay with your Dad’s friend. He’s not a total stranger. Your Dad would not have reached out to him for help if he didnt trust his judgement. As a pp said though, in order not to wear out your welcome, I would plan to stay there only 2-3 nights, then move to other accomodation.

    I would book something refundable now for the last 2- 3 nights. Who knows? Maybe this man has a gorgeous place that is more than big enough for company?

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