Post # 1
…..I have heard of people adding their NOT invited kids names onto the wedding invation when sending back their acceptance as they were offended the kids were not invited!
Is this ok or not ok? Id love to hear some opinions on this?
Post # 4
It’s rude. Don’t put your kids on the RSVP if kids aren’t invited.
Post # 5
@ambergirl: We’re allowing kids at our wedding, but if we weren’t, and someone did this knowing that it was adult only, then I’d be a bit ticked and would make it a point to tell them again that it was adult-only. That’s just rude.
Post # 6
@ambergirl: Completely not ok. If the invitation offends you, send your regrets.
Post # 7
Just wondering why people do this and think its acceptable, I think its so not ok!
Post # 8
@ambergirl: I have no problem with a little tag line that reads “adults only reception” – I think it’s rude when people assume their children are invited to formal affairs.
Post # 9
it’s not acceptable to just add anyone! I can’t stand when people do that. FH mom wanted to do that to his cousins wedding I was like “noooo do not do that!” I don’t get why people think it is okay to me it is rude! I would definitely talk to that person and gentle and calmly explain that it is an adult wedding
Post # 10
I agree with the PPs. totally rude to add a name
Post # 11
@sinfulli2sweet: If anyone does this for our wedding they will be getting an angry Groomzilla phone call. Our reception venue can only accomodate 80 people, and we are planning to have exactly as many guests as we can accomodate. So, each of your kids would actually have to bump another guest from the list.
Post # 12
@ambergirl: The people who did this to us said they just assumed their whole family was invited. But I’ve heard stories of other people who think it’s rude that their kids weren’t invited so they just put them on the RSVP. Maybe out of spite?
Post # 13
Absolutely not ok. I don’t know if you’ll find anyone on the Bee who thinks that’s a good idea, but that opinion may come up every once in a while among people who have never had to plan/pay for an event, and don’t understand good etiquette and manners.
Post # 14
Not okay, not even a little. The only people who should RSVP are the ones invited. I can understand it with people who really thought the whole family was invited, or haven’t planned a large event like a wedding before. But if they know your kids are not invited and list them just to make a point then that is very rude.
Post # 15
@ambergirl: If one is offended, then one declines. That is the only alternative a guest has to accepting. Changing the invitation is simply not possible: just as you can write an extra “00,000” after the “1” on a one-dollar bill: it doesn’t change what you’ve got, it just shows that you are delusional. If you cross out “wedding” on the invitation and write in “bar mitzvah” it does not change the bride into a thirteen-year-old male. And if you cross out “Mr and Mrs Smith” and write in “Mr and Mrs Smith, Miss Smith, Miss Suzy, and Master Joey” it does not mean that the little Smiths will be welcome or that there will be food and place-settings for them when they arrive.
It does, however, warn the bride ahead of time so that she can station a bouncer at the door to her reception salon with a list of invited guests and instructions not to admit anyone not on the list.
Post # 16
Completely rude and unacceptable.