(Closed) Addressing multiple people in household?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

I would probably give separate invitations. I heard somewhere that people over 16 should each get their own invite, even if they are living in the same house.

Post # 6
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

@LisaC: Well if you can’t give separate invitations (I’m assuming because if budget?)… I’m not sure lol. 

Post # 9
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

Eh, I do not think that would be terrible. Ideally you should have their significant others/fiance’s names in there as well, but there is only so much room on an envelope lol!

Like I said above, I think it is actually proper etiquette to send anyone over 16 their own invitation, but I would not stress it too much.

Post # 10
Member
1696 posts
Bumble bee

Proper etiquette is, that you write three separate invitations to the three separate adults in the household. This isn’t “wierd”; it recognizes the reality that room-mates can live together and still have their own lives. You can put all three invitations into the same outer envelope, and just address that outer envelope to whomever you want to be entitled to open it. In English-speaking countries outside the U.S., that’s supposed to be the female head-of-house, who I presume would be the elder sister.

For the girlfriend and boyfriends, you are supposed to find out their names and addresses, and send them their own invitation at their own home. The reason for this is that, even though you and I and probably they themselves know that they are second-class guests who are only invited because they know your cousins, you can never admit that nasty little truth or act on it. Proper etiquette requires that you treat *all* your guests as people whom you value in their own right.

That being said, while what you propose is not completely proper, I wouldn’t call it a “total etiquette no-no” either. You are still extending an invitation, which your guests ought to appreciate better than were you to not invite them at all. If your social circle is accustomed to cut costs in this way, and as long as you aren’t treating your cousins any more cheaply than you would any other guests who happened to be room-mates, you can probably get away with it. Your mother or aunts would be able to let you know whether this kind of cost-cutting is acceptable in your family.

Post # 11
Member
988 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

You send three separate invites in three separate envelopes to the same household.  Anything else is cheap and bad etiquette. 

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