Post # 1
I’m having trouble with an issue right now. I very hastily asked my fiance’s sister to be a bridesmaid because I figured that it would be a nice gesture towards our future sister-in-law relationship. I definitely feel that I was too hasty, though. She’s not really a true friend, and we aren’t that close, and even if she’s going to be family, I honestly don’t feel comfortable about it anymore.
I’m trying to figure out a way to tell her that I would really just rather have my four closest friends in the wedding. Plus, it does not help that my maid of honor can NOT stand her (my future SIL).
Ways to handle this?
Post # 3
honestly? i would leave her as a Bridesmaid or Best Man. i understand that your decision was hasty and that youre not comfortable with her being a Bridesmaid or Best Man anymore, but i think you risk bad-blood between you both for a looooong time to come if you kick her out now. i wouldn’t want to start out on that foot with my in-laws.
Post # 4
I think you are kind of stuck with her if you don’t want to drastically upset your relationship.
While I am sorry for your prediciment, I think it is a good lesson to others, to be very careful about asking people when youa re excited and caught up in the moment.
She may well be feeling as awkward about it as you are. Talk to her and see how she is feeling about it.
Post # 5
I think you’re stuck having her as a bridesmaid. Once you ask her…it’s much harder to ask her to step down. When you do that to a friend, more than likely, the friendship is over. You don’t want your relationship with your Future Sister-In-Law to be over before it starts…so I would say try to suck it up as much as you can and leave her in.
Post # 6
My Future Sister-In-Law is my Maid/Matron of Honor and I sometimes wish one of my best friends were going to give the Maid/Matron of Honor speech and I know it’s going to be a bit awkward having her on the bachelorette party (she is 6 years older than me and my friends and doesn’t know my friends), so I know how you feel. That said, asking your Future Sister-In-Law to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man is really the right thing to do for family harmony and you would be creating a huge amount of drama if you tried to get out of it.
Post # 7
I think you should just keep her. Darling Husband asked his sister to be a female best woman for him, and she said no, she’d rather be a bridesmaid, and kind of put me on the spot, so I said yes. It wasn’t that bad, and like you said, I nice gesture toward the family that you’ll hopefully be for a long time.
Post # 8
perhaps you could put your on your FI’s side since it’s his sister? that’s what we are doing with my FI’s sister. I get along great with her though, but we decided that his family should be on his side.