(Closed) Advice for getting the FMIL/FFIL to let go?

posted 9 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
410 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I can totally understand and somewhat relate.  My FH is about 8 years older than me and has been married and divorced.  He is very self sufficient, but at the same time his parents have helped a lot.  They own the house that we live in, all our bills were in their names, and his savings acct is in his dads name with my FH as a signer on it(annoying). Now some of this is becuase of the divorce.  it is easier to protect things that are not in your name and we still have a couple years until she cant come back and try for allamony, but we wanted to be more independent.  I have always been independent with my finances and it was weird at first for me.  To get out from under the in laws we started with switching the utilities to our names, and slowly but surly we are changing everything to his name/our names except the savings(dont want to switch it until the allomony seeking period is over). And we are going to buy a house this fall hopefully and give this on back to them for their retirement….

So basically, I would start small.  I fully understand that you guys should be able to handle your own finances, but dont rush it.  Just slowly butt them out, or talk to them about possibly helping you learn their way of doing things and start slowing taking over the responsibility from them.

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