Post # 1
So I’m currently not working and we’re being very frugal. But we have a big apartment that is very centrally located amongst our friends, and two of my husband’s friends asked if we could host for the game. My husband wants to get really yummy BBQ catering for about $18 pp, or subs/salads/apps for about $14 pp. Their plan is to charge our guests for this food. These are all very close friends, BTW, who know our situation, and would probably feel comfortable telling us we were tacky to our faces.
I feel really uncomfortable with this. Even when my family was down on their luck, we always had generous parties, and I think it’s really tacky.
My husband says “if they don’t want to pay, they don’t have to some” (or come and not eat), but that makes me feel icky.
My solutions were either a) have the people who asked him to host pay for the food (and we’ll chip in a bit too), or b) go potluck. My husband disagrees with me so vehemently he actually just raised his voice a little when I suggested it was tacky.
I hate it because in this case if we do it his way, it’s not like I can go apologize to people, I’d have to own it like I was fine with it. What do the bees think?
Post # 3
@Cecilia37: Are you paying to bring in caterers? Why not just ask everyone to bring a dish?
Post # 4
I would feel the same way you do, I would just never want people to pay at a party we’re hosting. Is there a reason he’s so set on that particular caterer? You could make your own party food for much less, or go potluck.
Post # 5
@SpecialSundae: No, picking up the food at the deli or BBQ joint.
Potluck is one of the options I mentioned, I’ll take your reponse as a vote for that, thanks!
Post # 6
He would rather make people pay money, than just have a potluck so people can bring a dish? That makes no sense. He’s being ridiculous. If you don’t want to spend the money, best to have everyone contribute a dish. However, if your friends are as close as you say, why not just ask them if they want to all chip in for catering, or do it potluck style?I wouldn’t find it out of the ordinary if my friends said “Sure, we’ll host since we have the room and the location is great, but let’s all pitch in for the food!” Maybe some others find this in bad taste, but I actually feel bad when people host parties and spend so much money on food. It adds up FAST!
Post # 7
If you’re bringing in actual catering I dont think it’s bad to charge per head but I wouldnt charge for a regular party.
Post # 8
eh I’d never host a party in my home and charge people anything – it’s not a college frat party! If you can’t afford to host a party then you don’t host one.
Typically when we host, people bring beer or snacks, hopefully your friends are the same way! If not, I say have a potluck – those can be fun for an event like superbowl! Otherwise, order a few pizzas and call it a day. No need for 18/pp catering.
Post # 9
I would cringe. I think it’s extremely tacky.
Post # 10
@jny1179: this. Ask your friends =)
Post # 11
@Cecilia37: we usually do potluck with a money option for those who would rather eat and not cook.
Post # 12
I would go potluck. Works out great and there’s always enough food for everyone. If they asked YOU to host, they can help out!
Post # 13
Don’t cater a party and expect your guests to pay, if anything, arrange a pitch in where everyone brings a dish or something like that…but charging for catering when they had no input? I would die of embarassment for you!
Post # 14
- Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo
I have to admit, I have had parties with friends where we had everyone chip in a little for the food we were cooking… however that was when we were all in college with minimum wage or no jobs at all, so everyone was in the same boat. Now that we (or at least I) have big kid jobs, I would never host a party where I made others pay. I think potluck is a way better way to go.
Post # 15
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
Another vote for potluck. Asking people to pay for food is not in very good taste.
Post # 16
I would go potluck. I think it’s rude to ask people to pay for a party hosted at your house.