Post # 1
I am finally going to ask my girls to be in my bridal party. I am having 2 maids of honors, 1 bridesmaid, 1 junior bridesmaid and 2 flower girls.
For the maid of honors and bridesmaids: I am putting together a mini binder/planner that will include the typical duties as well as some funny ones, monthly calendar, attire, contacts, guest list, budget sheet, and a personalized letter/card from me asking them to be in the bridal party. (This is the idea and I plan on starting on this project this weekend)
I was thinking of asking my one MOH to sign the license and the other MOH to hold the ring/bouquet & stand next to me. I was just going to do it by age since they are both my sisters – the older one stands next to me and the younger one signs the license. What do you think – would you be offended just standing there while the other signs the license or do you think it’s not a big deal?
The junior bridesmaid and one flower girl are my daughters so I am not asking them because they already know they are in the wedding The other flower girl is my MOH’s daughter, should I just add a line in my letter asking her to allow her daughter to be a flower girl?
Post # 2
I should have added that the flower girl, daughter of MOH, is only 1.
Post # 3
Tricky. I have a similar situation as I have three sisters. I think what I’m going to ask my oldest sister to sign and do it by age too. I don’t think the others will be offended and if they are… well really, it’s just about signing a piece of paper. I keep trying to tell myself not to over-think this! 🙂
Post # 4
ecrowe1218: why the heck do your BM’s need all that info???!!!! Seriously somebody hands me a binder like that and I’d run for the hills.
I had 2 MOH’s. I asked them to figure it out between the two of them.
Post # 5
I too am a little confused about these binders, why so they need them? If you want a certain type of dress etc. That is something you should talk to them about, and trust me go try them on in person, they might not even look good on your gals! Do you want them spending tons of money on smth they look awful in? What is on the calander? You should work with these girls to pick out dates for things and the Budget?! Ack! Is this a budget you require then to spend or of your wedding? Because bridesmaids aren’t co wedding planners that is your FI. Obviously you want them to follow your vision but you didn’t suddenly become a dictator, you get more flys with honey as they say. IMO I would have no desire to be a BM to someone who acted that way!
Post # 6
I wouldn’t mind the binders, personally, but I am kind of obsessed with school/office supplies to begin with. I am putting together a .PDF of info for my girls so they can keep abreast of everything. I’m having a bit of a nontraditional wedding, so I want to make sure all of my girls are aware of what is going on. I think the binder is definitely a cute idea, I will just caution that they may not want to use it, so don’t be upset or hurt if they opt against using it how you want. My maids are the same way: I wanted to get them all Lilly Pulitzer planners, but quickly realized no one would use them (except one or two of my bridesmaids).
As for which sister to ask: Perhaps I’m wrong, but are siblings allowed to sign the marriage certificate? If so, I wouldn’t worry too much about it. If they are your sisters and love you, they shouldn’t be upset by something trivial like who gets to sign the license or who gets to stand next to you. It’s very considerate of you to want to give them each a special role. I also have two sisters, but I only had one sister be my MOH–no hurt feelings on the other sister’s end.
Post # 7
It was just something I thought was cute to put together. The pages would just be “helpful guides” for them. If they don’t want to use it that’s fine but I just thought it was a cute idea since I am super obsessed with binders and they make fun of me for it.
It has nothing to do with helping me plan a wedding or me dictating what they should do or wear. Basically it would include, a funny list of your role (if you choose to accept)…example: protect bride from evil spirits and inform her if she is becoming one. if i start to become to obsessive, pull me away from my binder and get me out for a drink or 2. remember to include the bridal party, mother of the bride, and mother of the groom in any event planning, accompany me to the dress fitting (so you finally get a glimpse), put on your dancing shoes and keep the dance floor going, etc.
Calendar: so they can fill in any dates they need or if they try to plan something they would have one handy. i’m also going to include some silly “holidays”
An explaination with attire ideas – how much of a discount the bridal shop offers if we choose to go there. the color, fabric, and length but explanation that the style is up to them and does not need to match. A list of pricing if they choose to use the girls I am hiring for makeup & hair.
Bridal party contact list , Blank guest list form if they do plan any wedding events,Their own budget tracker – if they want one place to keep track of their spending, im also going to give them a timeline of events the closer it gets to the big day. if they choose to get their hair done with me or not, what time to be at the church or at my house for transportation to the church, etc
PLus I am including cute pens, post it notes, some cute stationary.
Bottom line is if they don’t use it that’s fine but in no way am I trying to micromange anybody. It’s supposed to be silly (cuz thats how my FI & I are) and if its useful then so be it. Either way I won’t be offended. It’s more of a spin off of their ongoing joke of my super large wedding binder.