Post # 1
I am getting married next July in Southern CA. I am undergoing treatment for my stage 4 cancer and therefore, my fiancee and I are on a budget. I have already chosen my neighborhood parish to have a Catholic Ceremony (most important), but I am indecisive as to my reception. I have a few ideas, but I would like your advice on which one is better. 1) Invite our immediate family (20 guests) to our ceremony followed by a reception for our immediate family at a restaurant. 2) Invite everyone (relatives+friends=120 guests) to our ceremony, then go to lunch/dinner with our immediate family (20 guests), and at night invite everyone to join us at a tapas bar/club to dance the night away.
P.S I postponed my wedding 2 yrs ago because I was diagnosed with stage 3 cancer and now it has come back. I am not going to postpone it again.
Any advice and/or ideas would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!!!
Post # 2
If I were you, I would want to celebrate with my entire family and all my friends. Surviving cancer is a great feat, and I think that it might be awesome to celebrate with everyone.
But, I’m not you. I think you should pick what feels right for you, and go for it!
Post # 3
LilyValley: Although I am sure all of your friends and family will be thrilled to see you marry under any circumstances, it would stil be rude to invite 120 people to the ceremony then only feed 20 of them.
Have the wedding you can afford. If you want a dinner reception and can only afford dinner for 20, invite 20 people.
If you want 120 people to see you marry, have a cake and punch reception, tea and sandwiches, brunch etc- whatever you can afford.
Post # 4
LilyValley: I also think you should do what is best for you, and go for it! Planning a wedding can be stressful for some people, and not so much for others. Also, you are the only one who will know how you will handle your treatment.
Post # 5
Invite immediate family to ceremony and dinner, then invite anyone who is interested to go out dancing. Kinda rude to make people show up for an hour of catholic mass then make them fend for themselves for something to eat but expect them to go out partying with you.
Post # 6
I am sorry about your diagnosis. Honestly I would want to celebrate with you if you were my friend but I would understand that it isn’t about me. I think you and your FI should decide if you want 20 people or 120 people to witness your ceremony. Then figure out a reception plan after that. There is nothing wrong with a simple reception, in fact some of the best receptions I have been to have been simple backyard parties.
I also think in your circumstances you might be suprised at the help you will recieve to pull off your big day.
Post # 7
I think it could be really lovely and meaningful to have a small wedding wth just immediate family. That being said, I loved inviting my whole group of friends and family, so that’s the route I would go. The only thing I would warn against would be making most of your guests have a huge gap between the ceremony and dancing. If you want a meal with the immediate family, you could always do that at the rehearsal dinner or the nex day. But I would plan the events for the whole group to be right after each other. You could do a later ceremony and then right to dancing. Or an afternoon ceremony with a punch and cake reception. There are lots of options!
Post # 8
Do a morning wedding with cake and punch and dancing. Send everyone home for lunch.