Post # 1
Born and raised in WI and FH was born and Raised in TX, when we met he was living in WI and we decided to move to TX to be with his family. FH has a small family since he isn’t close to anyone on his father’s side. So he has 1 aunt, 1 cousin, 2 uncles, and his grandma, he has 3 married cousins with kids whom I’ve never met so I don’t know whether to invite them? I’m close to my mom, dad, grandma, and 3 sisters aged 23, 2, and 3. Due to my younger sisters my parents don’t have the funds to fly to Texas and my other sister doesn’t work she relies on rich boyfriends, and my grandma is in crappy health. If I paid there way to TX I’d be looing at $2000 minimum and don’t even know if my grandmother could make it in the TX heat. FH’s family can’t fly either b/c his family is either unemployed, disabled, or retired so they can’t fly to WI. What am I to do? Have a small wedding in TX and then have a big formal wedding in WI? I have about 50 family members total in WI. FH suggested we have a wedding in both states but it kills me to think my family won’t be there when we get married and if we get married in WI his family wont be there for the celebration either. Plus when we do wedding photos do I hang up both wedding locations? Do I announce our first wedding day or do I say it’s the 2nd wedding day b/c it’s a bigger more formal wedding? Will guests understand why we’re having two weddings? Please help me!
Post # 3
Is there a middleground? My Fiance is from Austria, I’m from California. His family and friends are in Austria and the east coast of America, all of mine are in California, Hawaii, and the southeast. We’re getting married in PA because it’s meeting in the middle. Maybe you could find somewhere that is driving distance for his family, and doesn’t cost as much for your family?
Post # 4
i agree with the middle ground. My family is in FL, my SO’s family is in TN, but we both were raised,met, and still live in atlanta, GA, even after our parents moved back to our origins. Ga is a perfect middle ground for us
Post # 5
I am in a very similar situation and we are just having multiple weddings. We are planning our big wedding here where we live for all our friends and church family and a small family only wedding for his family in WV. Then a small family only wedding for my family in NEPA. We are reusing alot of the stuff and his mom is providing all the food for his family. My stepdad can be depended on to make a great meal for my family so other than gas money I am out very little. I am telling no one when our “real wedding” really took place so that there are no hard feelings. When people demand an answer I just smile and nod. The only one who will know is FI’s (pastor) friend who will act as our best man in the big wedding and the officiant in the small family only weddings and he can be counted on to keep a secret. It was the only way to even partially satisfy all sides. 😛
I am having a winter wonderland theme for our small family only weddings and a vintage theme for our large one. I like the fact that they will be in direct contrast. I may change out our wedding photos based on the season lol.