Weddingbee boards

My wedding was in August, but for some reason, I felt inspired to write this today. Perhaps this will help someone out down the road. My wedding was romantic, and perfect in every way, and I'd love pass on what I did right...and what I may have done differently...

1. Before you do anything else, define your budget. If you are doing the budget yourself, you shouldn't have any problems with this. If other family members decide to pitch in, try to find out what the total amount is they are willing to give you as opposed to can they pay for the flowers, or the limo or whatever. I didn't do this, and had help from our family, and looking back I would have probably used the money differently.

2. Try your absolute hardest to say sane. I, personally, am an artsy person, I analyse everything and I'm creative. It is so, so easy to go crazy with the wedding stuff. And I'll tell you, it is easy to make some really bad decisions because your brain is just not itself until after you are married...for a month! Do absolutely everything you can to remain calm. Workout, do yoga, get a massage, get a wedding planner that you love. You must stay sane.

3. Prioritize!! Once you have your budget, sincerely sit down and look at your budget. Now that my wedding is over, it is so easy to prioritize where I want to spend my money... 1. The Dress, 2.The photographer, 3. The food 4.The wedding planner. 

4. Pick a dress that feels like "you" not something that feels like your in a costume, that you bought only because of the amazing price. I am a THREE DRESS BRIDE. Yes, THREE. My first two gowns I bought because they were el cheapo and I thought I was doing myself a favor to get something cheap. Don't do this to yourself. This is the one chance in your life to wear a white wedding gown...get something you love. There ARE other gown designers out there than Maggie Sottero, David's and AA. Don't rule out pre-owned wedding dresses either. You may find just what you are looking for. If you do this, consider yourself a "green" bride.

5. Only get an event planner if you can afford a good one. That doesn't mean they can't be new to the business, but there should be a certain something there that you see when you hire them. I wanted to do a lot of my wedding planning myself, and hired this woman to be my DOC. There were a few specific things I needed her to do, like keep an eye on certain family members, etc, and she did NONE of them. I was so dissappointed because some things did go wrong entirely because of her. It was a certain ease of mind, to know she was there the day of, but I really don't think she did anything but take photos of my wedding and post them on her blog as though she designed the event... she didn't.

6. Be true to your roots. Whether this is with what gown you pick, what colors you want, your wedding overall "look," or your music, go with what you love and what you feel comfortable doing. For example, my FI and I had a swing band for the reception. This means no Brick House, YMCA, Thong Song, etc. No, my bridesmaids did not get up and make a big dance circle with me on the dance floor, but that's not really any of us at all. Instead, all of them got to get up and dance with their significant other and it was a very romantic evening for everyone. This is very much my hubby's and my style. If we had a DJ who was playing top 40 stuff, our wedding reception would have actually been awkward! It was perfect!

7. You don't necessarily need to spend an arm and a leg on flowers. I used one of the "top" florists in my area, and he screwed up my bouquet and my mother's bouquet royally. I specifically told him that I didn't want a bouquet that was a perfect sphere or 1/2 sphere, I wanted something natural, and I didn't want the stems to look like a wrapped up penis (this drives me up the wall). My mother wanted a nosegay...and very, very small bouquet almost the size of a boutonierre. The day of the wedding, he didn't listen to us at all. I think the florist was such a big company, he gave the job to one of his associates. My mother's bouquet was about the size of a bridesmaids! We had such a beautiful venue, we would have been fine with smaller floral arrangements even at the reception. Seriously, people don't notice the flowers as much as you think they do.To add insult to injury, even the bouquets at the reception weren't what I had invisioned.

8. Pick a beautiful venue. If you have a beautiful venue, your guests will be impressed, and you will love it. I loved my venue. As I said before, we had this top of the line florist, but honestly, we really didn't even need him. If you have a great venue that has great food (never skimp on the food) people will love your wedding.

9. Get a great photographer, even if its not for the full day. I read this before, but I didn't take this too seriously, as i wanted to remember a beautiful day, and thought I wouldn't care too much about the photographer... well, I do now!! My photographer was decent, but she didn't get a ton of photos that I wanted, and its tough not to have. So, this goes in my prioritizing up above.

10. Have a backup plan for getting to the church on time if the limo dies. The limo died that was going to pickup the groomsmen. They were 15 minutes late but could have walked to the church in 5 minutes... Enough said.

Whew. Okay, well, sorry for the book, but I hope that someone out there can benefit from all of this!

Your welcome ladies! I thought this might be of some help!

moderndaisy- It was a bit of an ease of mind to have the doc there, even though she didn't really do her job. 

I actually interviewed about 5 different wedding planners. I didn't really click with anyone of them. I think the key is to find someone who you can relate with and who can understand your vision. Look for a wedding planner that you can see yourself in, and someone you could see yourself being friends with. Even if you don't know it, there is some type of style that you like to dress in and decorate in, and you probably have some favorite artists/music. When you meet with your coordinator, see if she understands your style, or better yet, if you understand her's!

The other side of this is the coordination part of it yourself. Pick someone that seems street smart and knows how to answer the question, "What problems have you resolved and/or kept from happening at past weddings, and why should I have an event planner?" Even if they're new, they should have some kind of quick response to keep you confident in their services. I never received this from any of them. I'm probably going to dig myself a hole in saying that, as I am currently starting my own event business myself! lol

Anyway, I hope that helps!

This is such a nice, helpful post!  And you obviously put a lot of time into it.  I like hearing things like you have said because it validates what I already think.  Like...my dress.  It's waay more expensive than I have ever spent on clothes which makes me half feel guilty and half be super excited!  Also I like how you said to keep it real for you.  We want the wedding to feel like us and I'm trying hard not to get sucked into details that will take us away from our casual/nice goal.

Thanks : )