Post # 1
I am 18 i know i am very young heard that so many times. And i am getting married June 8th. I just need advice with everything im dealing with alone. MY fiance and his mother are great people but everyone has an ugly side. Me and my fiance are both 18 which is difficult for us to deal with because were both are on our paths being adults but not there yet. I feel like im dealing with pressure with making it the way everyone wants it and im on a budget with my wedding. I am trying to make everyon’s ideas possible but i feel like my ideas are being heard and if they are its being ignored. I know for a fact im not all perfect and nice i admit i have a temper and bad side. But my fiance are getting married soon and me and him are already dealing with problems like work and school and on top i have to live with his mother and that what kills me inside i like his mother but my fiance is like a momma’s boy in a way. If he has a idea she backs him up but if i dont like it im screwed because it is 2 against one. And i cannot postpone the wedding. There is time but i wouldnt want to . I just want to know what can i do in my case. I want things to go smooth. for my mother in laws sake and his since i am soon going to live with both. And dont get me started with my wedding … oufff thats a mess too ! but please if you have an advice please dont be afraid to tell me im open ears. I would like to hear out people because i feel alone :(.
Thank you for an advance
Post # 3
@josynix: hello again!! you and your FI are sooo young …. i really think you should take on board the advice i gave you in the previous post.
Post # 4
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
What you are describing is a big reason not to get married so young. He is still acting like a child rather than a mature adult ready to get married. When you marry someone you marry their family too if they are close with them or in this case still live with them. While you’re in your FMIL’s you are stuck living with her and at least some of her rules. If you don’t like it you have a few choices: 1) get married and deal with it; 2) get married and move out with your FH into your own place; 3) wait to get married until you are both more self sufficient (i.e. have your own place and are done with school.)
Marriage is difficult even in best scenarios. People say you’re too young because at 18 it is unlikely you have lived by yourself or paid bills under the threat of eviction or repossession. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t marry your FH, it only means in the Bee’s vast ages and experiences, the younger you are at the time you get married the more likely it is to fail because there are added pressures and expectations that come with marriage that take time and maturity to deal with. Many of us have been there because we too thought we were old enough and mature enough; a few succeeded while many, many other failed and ended up in our mid-20s divorced.
Getting married is not going to magically solve al of your problems with your FH and FMIL. Unfortunately, it will likely only make them worse.
Post # 6
Thanks and i understand i will just deal with it and compromise. I am just afraid our marriage will fail but his mother will soon go to her country. I guess all parents want is the best for there children. I just need to be mature enough and talk it out with them and be able to fight through these difficult situations because it will be and him soon and things will go well we work well as a couple and enagaged but when his mother is in our situations its not right. And thanks .
Post # 7
Yeah lol i know i get that a lot . but ill just stick up to my ideas and my situations i may hurt a few people on the process but im whilling to make things smooth no matter what the costs are.
Post # 8
@josynix: Why are you getting married at 18? Why dont you wait until you are a little older?