- 3 years ago
- Wedding: May 2016
I still don’t have a ring, but after some really long, emotional talks, I finally was able to communicate how not knowing anything made me feel, and BF finally told me he’d been trying to plan, but hadn’t been able to afford the ring he’d picked, let alone save for the elopement he wants to do. He said he had no idea I felt so worthless, and after some tears, we’ve actually broken the barrier to discussing it – me because I thought he didn’t want to, him because he was ashamed he couldn’t do anything yet and only wants a 6 month engagement. He told me he wants me as his wife, has for years, but hasn’t been able to save up (I got laid off last spring, and thought I was only out of work a few week, and underemployed a few months, and am now working full time again, it threw a lot out the window for us – I got my degree first and so have the higher paycheck – losing it even shortly hurt).
Soooo, I now feel I can try to look into what we both agree we want – a very small ceremony at a vacation location to combine the ceremony and honeymoon to save money, and also since the only living family I have is crazy (mostly a sociopathic dad who enjoys stalking me) and I do not want them able to pop in out of spite, we’d prefer it be out of state (Texas) – BFs family makes him uncomfortable, and we really only want a couple of very close friends to be invited. The explanation of fearing my dad is pretty much enough to assuage any hurt that might arise from wanting to keep it far and away from family. We both love the movie “Somewhere in Time” but the Grand Hotel ceremonies seem pricey even without adding the travel and lodging. This is still a while off, but I will feel more like saving towards a goal, instead of something nebulous, if that makes sense, so I’d like to look for some ideas.
I thought something Caribbean might be nice if Michigan is too much to save for, but as I’ve avoided looking at this kind of thing for years, I’m a little overwhelmed at how many places there seem to be all over North America. Ideas? I’m going to read up and see what other ladies are doing on here, but