- 6 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
When is it going to end. When is he going to propose. Why does he talk about wedding ideas with his guy friends and then they tell me. You would think it was coming soon, right? I think not.
We had date night last night. A beautiful night at the beach, Me, him and our pup. BBQing and swimming and just relaxing. It was a nice relaxing date night, we laughed and all in all had just a great time. Then the wedding talk started. ugh I wish it was never brought up, because now bees I’m more sad then I was before.
In my head I had pictured him asking this summer but apparently we are on two different pages, or chapters. I thought it would be some time around 4th of july ( that’s our day, as we say lol) He gave all the hints, and in pervious post on here, the timeline he gave me ( 6 months ago) was the summer.
Well anyway. Our convo started like this. He said ” I saw a really cool limo the other day and I think it’s the limo I’ll pick for the girls to ride in” ( Our deal was I get to plan everything, he gets to pick the rides..typical guy lmao) Me- ” wow, that makes me really happy that you think about wedding things also” him ” yeah ” Then I didn’t want it to end so I really can’t remember how the rest went but some where towards the end he said ” I’m not in a rush, theres no rush to get married. I don’t understand why IT has to be right now, Weddings are expensive, RINGS are expensive and I know your going to say then I shouldnt have bought my bike and everything but I cant finance a ring. The lady at the jewllery store told me not to. And my bike isnt taking away from you getting a ring now. why does it have to be right now. Why cant it be a year from now”
I wanted to cry. I had no where to turn so I did my normal ‘hide in my shell’ kinda thing and stayed quite. I wanted to shove him into the water lol. I was really upset.
I dont think its a rush. We have been together 5 years. Thats not rushing. Rushing would have been asking him to buy me a ring at 1 year or something. IDK I’m so fusterated.
later in the night he asked me what was wrong ( clearly it was written all over my face haha) So I told him that I thought we were on the same page and clearly we arent. I told him that it doesnt matter how much the ring costs, or if we do a backyard wedding. I told him ALL that matters is that commitment of him marrying me. I told him I’m over it. I’ll give him HIS time because obviously that’s what he needs. I explained that I would be his gf for the rest of our lives if thats what he wanted.
He just doesnt get it. He did say sorry for saying what he said but it’s to late. I feel like theres a ticking bomb in the side of my head.
Am I crazy? I really feel like I am. All I want to do is cry. I don’t understand how he can think that after 5 years, me wanting to be engaged is RUSHING! ugh It makes me sick thinking about it!
Thanks for reading and I know I complain alot but I really only have you bees to talk to. All of my “girlfriends” are my boyfriends friends girlfriends. So If I vent to them he will find out.
Any advice or any thing would be really helpful right now. You can even tell me I’m an idiot and I am over reacting.