Air your grievances here!

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I can’t seem to get anyone to get back to me. There’s a restaurant where I want to have the wedding if possible, and if not at least have them cater. We saw them on Valentine’s Day when we were having dinner, and they said to email them and we’d go from there. We emailed them on Saturday and haven’t heard anything. I realize it’s only been a couple days, but we’re leaving town in a week and won’t be back until August (and they know this). What we need to discuss with them can easily be done through email or on the phone, but an in-person meeting would be more quick and easy.
I’ve got a back up venue we want to look at before we leave. The first two site visits were cancelled because of the snow/ice we had. The third visit was cancelled because the woman’s dad died. It’s sad and I really do feel for her. She said she’d get back to me about a reschedule at the beginning of this week. Have I heard anything yet? Of course not. I don’t necessarily expect to hear from her, but it seems like she could pass me on to someone else who could show us around and give us the same information that she could. I feel like a bitch being so impatient with her, but nothing really bugs me as much as someone not getting back to me like they said they would.

Post # 4
Member
573 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I’ll play!

My SIL offered to host our wedding shower for us (this weekend!!). Our wedding is super laid back; I’m a laid back bride, I could care less that any showers are being thrown for me (but I am really excited and grateful for it). SIL makes an invite on Facebook for the shower and we invite all family that has a FB profile. We made calls to the ones who don’t and let them know that there will be a shower thrown, and they respond with well, we didn’t get an invite so I assumed that we weren’t invited. NO ONE got an official invite – except through FB. So people make a big stink about “not being invited” and when we personally reach out and explain how this all worked out, they says they can’t make it- for whatever reason. 

I totally understand, but really? Make a big stink about not being invited when you know you cant even come? IMHO, you won’t be missed.

And my MOH is really MIA on me right now – and I’ll admit, I need her more than ever. If you read my past posts, you’ll see that I chose to kick my original MOH out for pulling a super crappy stunt on me. I’ll admit, I should have chosen wiser, but it was my oldest friend and I sorta felt obligated but whatever. So my new MOH has lost her job, her husband smokes pot all day and refuses to even job hunt, and they just got a notice that their apartment complex is terminating their lease early and they need to be out by March 31st. My wedding is on April 5th and she is in a super vulnerable emotional state right now.

When it rains, it really pours for her and my heart goes out to her. This girl has always been there for me and our friendship comes so easy, I am super HONORED to have her up there with me on my wedding day. So I bought her dress for her, I’m paying for her gas to come down and help us set up everything – just anything I can do for her to make it to the wedding.

I have an irrational fear that she is going to flake on me though – not by her own doing, but because her husband is weirdly controlling over her psyche. When she comes to visit, he calls like 30 (no joke) times. He cries when she leaves to go do anything. Weird.

Vent over. Thank you OP, I needed this! 

Post # 5
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Oh, awesome – it’s not a big deal tome so I didn’t want to make a post to complain, but sometimes it’s nice to complain (especially with 10 days to go!!!)

My FSIL keeps trying to change plans to accomodate herself better. First, it was the bachelorette. She didn’t LIKE the hotel that another bridesmaid booked, so she wanted to book a different hotel for herself in a different neighborhood. She didn’t do that, but now she’s complaining about where we should go eat and generally trying to make everyone spend way more money than they need to.
Also, FSIL is the one who made arrangements for it to be in NYC – the one request I had was for it to NOT be in the city, but she did what she wanted to anyway, and now I’m stuck (so crowd-phobic, it’s bad enough the bachelorette is a big-ish group – I would have invited fewer people if I knew it was in the city!!!)

She also invited, then broke up with and uninvited, now got back together SORT OF and is trying to invite again, her boyfriend who she still isn’t sure if she’ll break up with.
WHATEVER, HE CAN COME; just stop trying to change our plans!!!

[ETA] Did I mentiong she’s not 16? She’s in her 30’s…. [/ETA]

FMIL promised to give us her tax return from last year toward our honeymoon, but I found out last week that she actually spent it on a vacation rental and some credit card bills. I didn’t know all this time – I thought she was saving it. ALL GREAT things to spend your money on, and I totally think it’s her money and she can do whatever she wants, but PLEASE don’t tell me you’ll give me something and then take it away!
I have some serious issues with people who do that.

Another bridesmaid, for some reason, keeps insiting on wearing white to my wedding. First it was her dress – I told everyone they could buy or re-use a little black dress. She had one, but it had a white sash. I said the dress was OK if she didn’t wear the sash, and she put up SUCH a stink about it that I had to say “no” to it. The other thing I told everyone was to wear silver shoes… guess what color she is wearing? White. Clunky, white mary janes – the kind you’d wear in middle school. I sort of just said “fuck it” and she can wear them… but I don’t know why she needed to make a big stink about wearing white.

It’s mostly these two bridesmaids that are giving me drama (FSIL and White Shoes), FMIL is fine (just a little confusing with money). I actually care less about this than it sounds – I am freaking TIRED and just want to be married already!

Last grievence: my right eye won’t stop twitching.
It started three days ago, probably from stress, and is REALLY annyoing.
*twitch*twitch*twitch*

Post # 6
Member
2428 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@CakeyP:  oh for heaven’s sake!! Bridesmaid drama is soooo annoying. Luckily it hasn’t happened to me (yet, knock on wood!) but my bff had 7 bridesmaids for her wedding so it was really difficult trying to plan stuff with that many girls, ESPECIALLY the bachelorette party! I also can’t believe one of your bridesmaids is making such a big stink about wearing white! I am freaking tired too…. but I still have 101 days to go! 🙁 hahaha. You’re almost there!!!

 

@glitterandsatin:  that’s really frustrating, I’ve been dealing with that with our bakery for the last two weeks. Our wedding is semi-destination, so all the vendors are mostly from that area. We made the trip out a few weeks ago to sample things and then I didn’t hear from them until just last night – and that was after three emails and a phone message. Hang in there! I hope you hear back soon!

Post # 7
Member
2428 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@DomesticDiva:  Sorry about your FFIL! It’s so lame when people make comments like that, especially if they’re just complaining and not trying to help you out (if it’s THAT big of a deal to him!).

Post # 9
Member
3935 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@DomesticDiva:   Good idea for a thread!!  Little bits of blah!  LOL  That belongs in a great quotation thread!

The first florist we saw for an estimate wouldn’t do a mock up of my bouquet – only of the centerpieces.  Hoping to find another florist.  

 

Post # 10
Member
2675 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

I just e-mailed our reception coordinator and asked when we should finalize details including linens etc. We were told  a few months after booking that they had a new reception/wedding coordinator. The woman I first met with quoted me prices on everything from up lighting to table linens and said she could get anything we wanted. This new woman now tells me none of that is handled by them and I need to take care of it myself.

Whaaat? So now I have to rush to get this taken care of…thankfully our DJ offers up lighting though I think it’s more than what the first reception coordinator offered us per light…and I just got an email about a linen event for 30% off all rentals booked the first week of March. So hopefully it works out, but this was stress I did not need.

Post # 11
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@DomesticDiva:  I actually don’t have over a year until the wedding, the date on here is just the made up one I pulled out of the air. We’re aiming for September of this year.

Post # 12
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@TaraMay_:  Finally heard back from our first choice caterer! I’ll be calling her back later today so we can pick a day to sit down and figure things out. You hang in there too! You’re date isn’t terribly far off, and now is not the time to have to beg to hear back from someone.

Post # 14
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@Ms_Purple:  If your contract stipulates you get lighting and linens, you get lighting and linens. I’d double check that before politely pointing it out.

Post # 15
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’ve got a grievance against The Peace Baker in New Orleans. The woman employs some seriously rude people in her bakery. When my mom went in to inquire about gluten-free cupcakes and grooms cakes she was basically told no one could help her because the owner had to deal with all of that. But the owner doesn’t have set hours that she’s there, apparently, because when I called twice I was told she only deals over email. Then, after getting a quote for their smallest offered cake with fruit filling and simple icing design, we were told that the icing design we wanted would be even more expensive, despite the fact that it was simple and no other baker in the area upcharges for a damn stucco effect icing. Then she wouldn’t tell me the upcharge for it, despite the fact that I told her multiple times I’m in Atlanta, not New Orleans, and cannot go into the bakery (that she’s never in and where the girls at the counter won’t take orders for grooms cakes) and order from any of the girls. Her email responses were short and didn’t answer many questions at all.

I ended up going with a baker closer to my mom’s house who is working out of her house until she gets her new storefront up and running. She’s quotted me a third less than the other woman and according to her facebook page, she’s got multiple people who went to her after getting shoddy service from Peace Baker.

 

Post # 16
Member
2675 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

@DomesticDiva:  Well they got back to me now and said all they can do is basic white table cloths. Which is sure better than nothing! But I may still look into renting some chair covers since their chairs are bright red and gold. Event Essentials is having 30% off all linens if you reserve them during their linen launch event the first week of March. I might do some colors on the tables too if I can get a good deal.

@Trilly:  I guess it was never in the contract, just something the previous coordinator told us about. We have now been told plain white table cloths are provided along with two tea lights per table. The new coordinator now says the previous one did this all on her own to be nice but it is not an offered service and referred me to the place to get the rentals myself.

I contacted our DJ and he was able to give me a pretty good deal on lighting for the reception. It was the same price and getting the stuff and DIY-ing it, so I thought it was good idea to just let them handle it.

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