Post # 1
Okay so my boyfriend and I are Christians. I’m not sure if you ladies know about Christianity and stuff but people tell us it’s bad to dance to any music that doesn’t worship the Lord. Now, I don’t want to get much into detail with that (trying to avoid drama) so my FI and I decided that we will have music and dancing cuz to be honest, it’s our day and we’ll always remember it so I’d like it to be a fun day. HOWEVER on the issue this post is about, I have a dilemma regarding whether we should serve alcohol or not. My FI doesn’t drink and I’m not old enough to drink anyway but we’ll have wine to do the toasts and things like that. Now 90% of my family doesn’t drink and most of his family does… but I don’t think we should have alcohol since neither of us drink. He DOES want to serve alcohol and his sister (one of our bridesmaids) is all excited about it and says if she has a job by then that she’ll pitch in for all of the alcohol…. but I really don’t want anything but wine! I just don’t wanna be stressing that day because people will be all drunk and maybe get into fights (FI’s cousins are really problematic-they have guns and im afraid they’ll take them). Also there may be conflicts because my fam doesn’t drink and may find it roudy because of the drinking. I just don’t want any drama on my day honestly but I’m kinda iffy about it cuz maybe they’ll get offended (mostly my soon-to-be-sister-in-law). SO I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO AND I NEED HELP!!! ;/
Post # 3
@_adrisabel: This is something you and your FI ned to discuss and come to an agreement on. It really doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.
Marriage is full of compromise. Start now.
Post # 4
We are having a dry wedding. FIs family does not drink and shames those that do while some of my family does. FI doesn’t drink and I do occasionally. It was pretty easy to say no alcohol.
However, if you do decide on a dry wedding, be prepared to be ridiculed and told how boring your wedding is going to be. No joke. Just be prepared to stick to your guns.
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
This is completely up to you and your FI. You are not obligated to serve alcohol. Beer and wine only might be a good compromise. Another option would be to have a champagne toast and that’s it.
(Also, only some denominations feel that way about alcohol and music/dancing. Mine certainly doesn’t. There’s nothing wrong with belonging to a denomination that does, but your blanket statement isn’t at all correct.)
Post # 6
@_adrisabel: I agree that you and your FI should come to an agreement about it this, with your own personal boundaries being paramount to the expectations of others.
If you decide to have a dry wedding, you could avoid the alcohol issue by hosting your reception during the day, when it’s less expected to have alcohol at a party, or in a location where alcohol is not permitted like a public park. Even though your FSIL says she’ll chip in, depending on the size of your guest list and requirements of the venue, alcohol can be really expensive, so your budget might limit what you can serve.