- 3 years ago
- Wedding: January 2014
I am so excited that I can now post on wb as a newly engaged person! I had only lurked while I was waiting. We just got engaged last weekend and already the planning and family issues have begun. Ever since FI and I went away to a beautiful all-inclusive resort in Mexico at the beginning of our relationship and said our i love you’s for the first time I have been into the idea of having a destination wedding there. This is the same resort where my family has a time-share and goes on vacation every other year or so and we all have so much fun. For those reasons it has special meaning but my other motivation is to escape all of the wedding planning and family issues that go along with having a big New York family, particularly Mom, who thinks there’s one right way to do it all and who has a ton of family and friends she thinks deserve to be celebrating with her.
My family has more or less come around to the idea because I’ve been working on them since before we have even been officially engaged, as long as we have something in NY for “all of the friends of the family” aka their friends. Even this is a struggle and every day or so one of my parents brings up how they would throw me such a nice wedding if only I stopped with the DW wedding idea. FI nor I live in New York, although a lot of our friends are there, and we aren’t even excited about the idea of a second reception there after we celebrate our actual wedding in Mexico. I wouldn’t want my parents to tell our family members that they don’t actually have to come to Mexico because of this second reception in NY, where they might go if there isn’t this reception. I know that according to etiquette rules we aren’t supposed to have a large engagement party if we aren’t inviting all of those people at the wedding. I’m leaning towards the idea of having a large engagement party, and inviting all of those people to the wedding in cancun, since it’s all-inclusive so it won’t change cost that much if they do decide to come. I feel like my whole life I have more or less done what they have wanted so I feel justified in insisting on a DW wedding but at the same time I don’t really want to offend family members or family friends.