Post # 1
So my plan has been to invite just 2 of my mom’s many aunts and uncles, and of course their spouses. These are people I feel close to and grew up with, while the rest of her aunts and uncles I don’t have relationships with, really.
However, my mom told me today that she asked my grandma about this and my grandma said there would be seriously hurt feelings if some but not all were invited. Because they all live in the same region, its not as if they wouldn’t find out who was invited.
So now I have to decide if I want to not invite these family members that I’d like to have, or if I want to invite ALL 10 or so of my mom’s aunts and uncles in order to have 4 people that I’d like. I know its not adding on that many people (probably 4-6 more) but its the principle more than anything. I just don’t want to invite practical strangers to my wedding and I want my wedding to feel intimate. I already feel like the guest list is growing way out of control!
What would you do? Just keep it to immediate family, or would you invite the great aunts and uncles?
Post # 3
this would make them your great aunt & uncles??? i became a great aunt in March and i would be very hurt if in 20 odd years time from now if my brother was invited to our great nephews wedding but i wasnt so my vote is that you invite them all to keep the family peace
Post # 4
I’m a bit torn on this situation. I too have some family I’d like to invite and others I would rather not pay for. However, in order to keep the peace, I am inviting all of my aunts and uncles as well as some of the cousins. My mom actually told me not to bother inviting them. But well my grandparents would be hurt and disapointed and I could never do that to them. And since we can afford it, well why not.
Post # 5
I’m in a similar situation. At first I refused to have anyone there that I’d never met or don’t know that well at all. But somehow family makes that change. If I were in your situation, I’d decide, is it better to hurt some people feelings that you don’t know well (and remember, with regard to weddings, SOMEONE’s feelings always end up hurt at some point), or save a lil extra money and have just the people you’re closest with. But, to be honest, I’ve tended to go toward the avoiding hurt feelings and HOPING they don’t show up anyway. Good luck!
Post # 6
I think you need to invite all people of equal relationship. I would love to pick and choose which cousins I invite… but too much drama.
Post # 7
I’d go for all/none. My family is in a similar situation, everyone is near and info travels pretty fast. It would stir up all sorts of ridiculous drama and pettiness, and blah.
I would guess that you could invite them and hope that they do not show.
Post # 8
i would have to agree with the other posters, it really is all or none. unfortunately i think i will have a similar problem and haven’t yet made a decision!
Post # 9
I would invite them. In 10 years I would look back and feel guilty about not including them, so I would bite the bullet and send them invites.