(Closed) Already invited BM… but childhood friendship dissolved :(

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Have you/ would you disinvite a BFF BM if she was no longer who you thought she was?
    Yes, if she was being bitchy : (0 votes)
    No, she's been a lifelong friend : (5 votes)
    100 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    911 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013 - The Down Town Club, Philadelphia

    Hmm. Maybe this is just my age talking (I’m 36), but I don’t know if these offenses are so bad as to make her “uninvited”. 

    When she does these things do you tell her outright that it’s not cool? If she knew that it bothered you, would she still do these things? 

    Is she single? Perhaps there is some wedding-envy going on?

    You don’t say in your post if you’ve discussed these things with her. If you have, and she still is being annoying, then at most I think you can ask her to step down as a BM. Maybe. 

    If you’ve been lifelong friends, that’s hard to just walk away from. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    911 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013 - The Down Town Club, Philadelphia

    @thundersvine:  She sounds a little broken, to me. It’s hard watching your friends get married if you’re not sure where your relationship is at. I’ve been that girl. It’s so not fun.

    Plase don’t think I’m “taking her side”, but it sounds to me like her bad behavior is stemming from jealousy and insecurity.

    Having said that, I think you need to honor the fact that spending time with her made you phyiscally ill. A mark of a good friendship is how you feel when you are with that person. Do you feel like the best version of yourself? That’s a good friend. Feeling ill? Not a good sign, ya know?

     

    Post # 6
    Member
    864 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    She just sounds like an alpha personality. Are you? If not that’s probably why you used to get along. Now she’s taking charge of a situation you want to be in charge of vs. before if she would take the lead in other stuff you were probably just content to let it be that way.

    Post # 7
    Member
    643 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    I’m not going to lie, sorry OP, but I think you’re over-reacting a little. None of these “offenses” warrant an exclusion from a bridal party and even less so from the wedding entirely. If there are other issues you haven’t mentioned, then maybe, but from what you’ve given us here: no.

    The topic ‘Already invited BM… but childhood friendship dissolved :(’ is closed to new replies.

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