What are some alternatives to the traditional bouquet toss? I am not comfortable having my single friends called up - this seems like an outdated tradition to me. I don 't think I want a break-away bouquet or a single flower for everyone so are there other ideas? I would rather just skip it but my FI wants to do the garter toss so it seems awkward to have one toss and not the other. Any thoughts?
My college roommate replaced the bouquet toss by looking for the couple who has been married the longest and gave their bouquet to them. She wanted to honor those who have been married instead.
I just started a thread (before I read your post) about a married couple dance off to identify the couple married the longest. I think its a really cute idea, and you could still do the garter toss. I don't think any single female guests would mind skipping the bouquet toss, its kind of humiliating IMO.
It's a Victorian thing where little charms on ribbon are tucked under/into the icing on the wedding cake.
Each charm depicts a ‘fortune’. There’s $ for wealth, a baby carriage for a child, a shamrock for good luck, an airplane for travel, a wedding ring for next to be married, etc.
I'm just having my BMs pick them out, but there are a wide assortment, so you could have enough (or even duplicate some) to accomodate more people.
I think it is a great idea to dedicate the bouquet to a special person in your life. I was planning on dedicating the bouquet to my mom right after the formal toasts- which would have been a really special moment, if I would have remembered to do it! The day went by so quickly that I forgot ! The planner forgot to remind me so it didn't happen (still a little bitter about it). But, in theory, I still think it is a great idea and a wonderful way for you to honor a friend or family member in a special way.
Funny that this comes up at the same time as the post about the married couple dance-off. I actually like this idea - presentation of the bouquet - much better. For anyone who didn't read the other post, the longest married couple at our wedding (56 years that day) declined to dance, as she had recently had a knee replaced. If you're the longest-married couple in the room, and the thing designed to honor you is something you can't do anymore, that kind of sucks. (If DH's dad hadn't passed away a year ago, his mom and dad would have been the longest married, at 58 years - but his dad was in a wheelchair the last two years of his life and so also couldn't dance.) Just something to think about.
i agree with suzanno... i also heard concerns about having a dance-off because usually the longest married couple is OLD and can't dance for that long! if at all. but i think it's a sweet idea.
we're doing something outside the box by having pinatas...here's the explanation we're providing to our guests..these will be printed on our stationary and there will be one at each table...b/c of the condensed space it looks wordier than it is but yeah..the pinatas will be filled with candy, dollar bills, fortunes, and other goodies...
<p style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Calibri">What's with the piñatas? <p style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Calibri">The morals of the piñata are all justified through faith. Since it was always hung above the heads of the participants, it symbolized what the faithful sought by looking toward the heavens yearning and awaiting the downpour of blessings. Being guided by surrounding participants represented the fellowship necessary to remain on course. <p style="margin: 13.7pt 0in"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Calibri">During our ceremony we asked you to pledge your support, encouragement, celebration and acceptance of our public expression of our personal commitment. Rather than participate in the tradition of the bouquet and garter toss we have chosen to use the piñata as a symbol of our faith in each and every pledge made here today. The breaking of the piñatas will represent the many blessings each of us will partake in once we leave this place. <p style="margin: 13.7pt 0in"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Calibri">But of course, we had to make it competitive, so there are 2 piñatas, one for male guests and one for female guests. Each is filled with lots of little surprises for those who participate but most important of all, the winner will determine who has to do the cooking and cleaning in mr. jazzman & miss jazzman's first month as a married couple! <p class="MsoNormal">
We're doing something different. Instead of presenting the bouquet to someone that married the longest, we're presenting it to the couple that's getting married next! 2 weeks after us to bring them luck!
I went to a wedding once that when the bride threw the boquet it split into about 10 pieces. I thought that was a good idea as half of the girls walked away with their own mini posy.
I didn't want to single out the single girls.. so i said for ALL of the girls to come up and my toss bouquet was a "candy bouquet" it had silk flowers in it.. but it also had chocolate truffles and other chocolate goodness. most of them knew that so they wanted that chocolate! in the end it was my husbands 4 year old cousin who caught it so we had the guy who caught the garter to wear the garter all night instead of having put on her thigh...
I'm not doing a bouquet toss, either. I always ran in the other direction when that happened at weddings and actually, almost all the women at the wedding will be married or engaged anyway! I like the idea of honoring someone with the bouquet (I would probably honor my mother) or giving it to the next couple to be married! Those are cute ideas!
I'm in the same boat as Surgie-- FH wants the garter toss, but there are few single women and even fewer that are going to appreciate being called to the floor to try to get married next... also very few long-married couples in our families because of inability to travel for the wedding, divorces, deaths of spouses, etc., and no upcoming weddings! All were great ideas, but none would work for our situation! I really like the idea of the break apart bouquet so lots of women catch part, and having *all* the women on the floor, but FH thinks no one will understand why all the women are being called out when only the single ones "should" be there for the toss..... did any of you who did this have confusion over your request, or have to explain why the DJ isn't just calling for the single women?
Instead of a garter or bouquet toss, we're going to gather all the single people together and toss out our "little black books", as a way of passing the single torch on to them since we won't need 'em anymore. And we'll be doing it to Cameo's song 'Single Life'. I think it's gonna be fun, and most importantly, non humiliating for anyone involved!
What are some alternatives to the traditional bouquet toss? I am not comfortable having my single friends called up - this seems like an outdated tradition to me. I don 't think I want a break-away bouquet or a single flower for everyone so are there other ideas? I would rather just skip it but my FI wants to do the garter toss so it seems awkward to have one toss and not the other. Any thoughts?
posted by Surgie 49 posts 3 months agoMy college roommate replaced the bouquet toss by looking for the couple who has been married the longest and gave their bouquet to them. She wanted to honor those who have been married instead.
posted by mamamiya 140 posts 3 months agoI just started a thread (before I read your post) about a married couple dance off to identify the couple married the longest. I think its a really cute idea, and you could still do the garter toss. I don't think any single female guests would mind skipping the bouquet toss, its kind of humiliating IMO.
posted by NorthCarolinaBride2B 47 posts 3 months agoI'm doing cake charms in lieu of a bouquet toss.
It's a Victorian thing where little charms on ribbon are tucked under/into the icing on the wedding cake.
Each charm depicts a ‘fortune’. There’s $ for wealth, a baby carriage for a child, a shamrock for good luck, an airplane for travel, a wedding ring for next to be married, etc.
I'm just having my BMs pick them out, but there are a wide assortment, so you could have enough (or even duplicate some) to accomodate more people.
posted by rosychicklet 301 posts 3 months agoI read once about a greek (?) tradition of writing the names of single guests on your shoes and which ever name(s) was the most worn off was the next to get married. Check out: http://greekweddings.wordpress.com/2007/12/11/the-bridal-shoe/ or http://jessicalynn402.blogspot.com/2008/06/soles-of-my-shoes.html. Happy planning!
posted by pinotnoir 41 posts 3 months agoI think it is a great idea to dedicate the bouquet to a special person in your life. I was planning on dedicating the bouquet to my mom right after the formal toasts- which would have been a really special moment, if I would have remembered to do it! The day went by so quickly that I forgot ! The planner forgot to remind me so it didn't happen (still a little bitter about it). But, in theory, I still think it is a great idea and a wonderful way for you to honor a friend or family member in a special way.
posted by MrsSpitzer 75 posts 3 months agoFunny that this comes up at the same time as the post about the married couple dance-off. I actually like this idea - presentation of the bouquet - much better. For anyone who didn't read the other post, the longest married couple at our wedding (56 years that day) declined to dance, as she had recently had a knee replaced. If you're the longest-married couple in the room, and the thing designed to honor you is something you can't do anymore, that kind of sucks. (If DH's dad hadn't passed away a year ago, his mom and dad would have been the longest married, at 58 years - but his dad was in a wheelchair the last two years of his life and so also couldn't dance.) Just something to think about.
posted by suzanno 1,953 posts 3 months agoi agree with suzanno... i also heard concerns about having a dance-off because usually the longest married couple is OLD and can't dance for that long! if at all. but i think it's a sweet idea.
posted by vee 172 posts 3 months agowe're doing something outside the box by having pinatas...here's the explanation we're providing to our guests..these will be printed on our stationary and there will be one at each table...b/c of the condensed space it looks wordier than it is but yeah..the pinatas will be filled with candy, dollar bills, fortunes, and other goodies...
<p style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Calibri">What's with the piñatas? <p style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Calibri">The morals of the piñata are all justified through faith. Since it was always hung above the heads of the participants, it symbolized what the faithful sought by looking toward the heavens yearning and awaiting the downpour of blessings. Being guided by surrounding participants represented the fellowship necessary to remain on course. <p style="margin: 13.7pt 0in"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Calibri">During our ceremony we asked you to pledge your support, encouragement, celebration and acceptance of our public expression of our personal commitment. Rather than participate in the tradition of the bouquet and garter toss we have chosen to use the piñata as a symbol of our faith in each and every pledge made here today. The breaking of the piñatas will represent the many blessings each of us will partake in once we leave this place. <p style="margin: 13.7pt 0in"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Calibri">But of course, we had to make it competitive, so there are 2 piñatas, one for male guests and one for female guests. Each is filled with lots of little surprises for those who participate but most important of all, the winner will determine who has to do the cooking and cleaning in mr. jazzman & miss jazzman's first month as a married couple! <p class="MsoNormal">
posted by meelahj 116 posts 3 months agoWe're doing something different. Instead of presenting the bouquet to someone that married the longest, we're presenting it to the couple that's getting married next! 2 weeks after us to bring them luck!
posted by lilneko69 199 posts 3 months agoI went to a wedding once that when the bride threw the boquet it split into about 10 pieces. I thought that was a good idea as half of the girls walked away with their own mini posy.
posted by dez 3 posts 3 months agoI didn't want to single out the single girls.. so i said for ALL of the girls to come up and my toss bouquet was a "candy bouquet" it had silk flowers in it.. but it also had chocolate truffles and other chocolate goodness. most of them knew that so they wanted that chocolate! in the end it was my husbands 4 year old cousin who caught it so we had the guy who caught the garter to wear the garter all night instead of having put on her thigh...
posted by MissStargazerLily 44 posts 3 months agoI agree about the dance for the couple married the longest. That seems like the best idea.
posted by kayteebug 27 posts 3 months agoI'm not doing a bouquet toss, either. I always ran in the other direction when that happened at weddings and actually, almost all the women at the wedding will be married or engaged anyway! I like the idea of honoring someone with the bouquet (I would probably honor my mother) or giving it to the next couple to be married! Those are cute ideas!
posted by meggyg8r 94 posts 3 months agoI'm in the same boat as Surgie-- FH wants the garter toss, but there are few single women and even fewer that are going to appreciate being called to the floor to try to get married next... also very few long-married couples in our families because of inability to travel for the wedding, divorces, deaths of spouses, etc., and no upcoming weddings! All were great ideas, but none would work for our situation! I really like the idea of the break apart bouquet so lots of women catch part, and having *all* the women on the floor, but FH thinks no one will understand why all the women are being called out when only the single ones "should" be there for the toss..... did any of you who did this have confusion over your request, or have to explain why the DJ isn't just calling for the single women?
posted by jlsween 44 posts 3 months agoInstead of a garter or bouquet toss, we're going to gather all the single people together and toss out our "little black books", as a way of passing the single torch on to them since we won't need 'em anymore. And we'll be doing it to Cameo's song 'Single Life'. I think it's gonna be fun, and most importantly, non humiliating for anyone involved!
posted by CocoPierce 12 posts 3 months ago