Money can be a HUGE issue. As most adults KNOW it can be a thing that can cause rifts between friends, family members… and when it comes to Marriage it is one of the biggest causes of Divorce.
As someone who prescribed to the 50-50 rule in my first marriage, I can tell you that in the long run this theory DOES NOT WORK.
Reason being, is there are times when one person in the relationship is going to make more money than the other… be that because of career, life choices, or just the fact that life kicks ya in the butt !!
So for example… KIDS – Mom takes Mat-Leave, or a Parent decides to stay-at-home for a while to raise the kids… CAREERS – Someone gets laid off from their job… or decides to take a leave of absense to pursue some other options in life (write a book, start a new business etc) … ILLNESS – One of you (or the kids) gets ill… or you have an aging Parent that needs your help or assistance
These are times when the disparity in income can really come into play… The Monthly Bills add up to $ 5,000 and one of you cannot afford to chip in $ 2,500… then what… one you has an IOU to the other ?
Meanwhile, the higher earner, may have a lot of extra money left over at the end of the month… to do with whatever they please ?
Not fair !! (One person virtually Broke, and the other out buying “toys” etc)
There are several Financial Gurus out there that say there are several ways to effectively plan out a couple
s finances.<br /><br />Either put ALL the money into a pot… and agree to pay out the bills and monthly expenses from it.<br /><br />Then have a Savings Plan… where EQUAL amounts are put into longterm individual savings (ie Retirement Plans). And lastly anything left over is then divided up between you EQUALLY as Spending Money… or put aside into joint savings for larger purchases you are doing together (vacations – home renos etc)<br /><br />The other way, is to divide everything up by percentages… so if Hubby makes 2x the amount of income as his wife, then he pays 66% of all expenses and she pays 33%.<br /><br />Personally, my first marriage tried to follow the 50-50 concept, and we failed miserably. It worked when we were young and making the exact same money… but over time, Hubby made a lot more money than I did, and I spent a good part of my marriage (and all of my post Divorce Years… BROKE).<br /><br />It was a bad plan, and I think it contributed to both our Marriages breakdown as well as the fact that he got more and more controlling and financially abusive in the relationship over time.
In my current relationship, we use a combo of the Percentage and the Combined Income model. My Fiance is in a position in life where he has more money (investments) than I do. We also are drawing up a Pre-Nup & Will to cover off for our future.
The money model that you and Fiance are using is a disaster waiting to happen (maybe it already has)… he SHOULD NOT BE KEEPING SCORE !!
t what a successful and happy marriage is about.<br /><br />You guys need to have a long talk on this.<br /><br />As someone who had the 50-50 Model, I would advise you seriously NOT TO MARRY anyone who cant understand that ALL the money belongs to both of you. Because of the heartache it can cause you in the future… My Ex even was of the mindset when we broke up that ALL that we had in our marriage was HIS… he owed me nothing. Consequently I found myself over $ 100 K in debt and virtually homeless coming out of my marriage (I ended up with some money… but I spent a great deal dragging his sorry butt in and out of court).
Actually, it might be a good idea to do some premarital counselling on this issue… look for a person who specializes in financial counselling.
Hope this helps,
EDIT TO ADD – Sorry, haven’t a clue how the HTML Code ended up in the middle of this post… hopefully you can make it out nonetheless