Am I asking for too much?

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
1241 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@mojitolady:  Tell him thank you for easing your fears, but that you’d like it to be a surprise from here on out. 🙂 

Sounds like it’s coming soon. Good luck with your waiting.

(Also, I hate surprises, I’d love if my SO told me that much.)

Post # 4
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: February 2016

Yeah, you can’t UNknow that it’s been ordered or when it should arrive. That doesn’t mean he can’t hold onto it for a few months. Just let him know that you appreciated the update and it made you feel more secure about his intentions. Then tell him that planning the proposal will be up to him but you want it to be a surprise. Then never mention it again.

Post # 5
Member
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You can’t have it both ways! Just let him know thanks for the update but I don’t want to know anythign else.  FWIW, I knew exactly when the ring was delivered and my DH proposed 36 hours later and it was a COMPLETE surprise. I had no idea he was going to do it that day.

Post # 6
Member
143 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

My fiance was pretty forthcoming with the details as he was planning, and I kind of wanted it to be a surprise.  I even had a pretty good idea the night he went to buy the ring.  It occured to me that it might be the night he would propose too, and I even went and got a manicure just in case!  Honestly, I was still absolutely shocked and trembling!!!  It really won’t matter in the end.  You’re going to be surprised no matter what.

Post # 7
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I agree with PPs,say something like “Thank you for making me feel better! I look forward to the surprise of when you decide to ask!”

Post # 8
Member
1015 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@mojitolady:  I think it’s very sweet that he wants you to feel secure that it’s coming and he’s serious about proposing. I would definitely thank him for that, and then ask that he keep the rest a secret!

Post # 9
Member
6964 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@mojitolady:  Poor guys… they are damned if they do and damned if they don’t. If I were you I would have stopped him before he gave specific dates. My SO is very likely to do something like that, too, just to keep me happy and calm, but I want a surprise. 

I don’t know your relationship, but in mine I would probably tell him “I am so thankful you wanted to give me the update and I know you did it to make sure I knew you are serious. I love you for that. Since it seems like we are on the same page, I’m not going to ask any more questions and please don’t give me any more updates. I will let you plan the proposal without risking the surprise.” Just so he would KNOW not to give me any more details. 

Post # 10
Member
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo

Your guy sounds so lovely to want to reassure you so thoroughly ^^ mark me as jealous :3

 

Even though when yoknow the date the ring should arrive doesn’t mean you know exactly how or when he’ll do it! Obviously it won’t be a complete 100% surprise but isn’t that worth trading for a lot of peace of mind? It’ll be surprise enough when it happens and certainly certainly romantic and special enough.

 

Good luck to the both of you! 

Post # 11
Member
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

As PP have said, it is so nice that he thinks about your feelings!! But if that doesn’t make you happy, you should tell him that you want it to be a surprise!

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