Post # 1
So my fiance and I have been together for 4 years. This engagement has been a LONG 4 years coming. Well, my cousin, who was with his fiance for 3 months propose the February before. Now, I have nothing against quick engagements unless they are prodded by the mother of the groom (She was afraid he was never going to get married… at 20…) Anyway, so the quick engagement was a little annoying but only because (at that point) we had been together for 4 years and still nothing from my fiance.
Now where it really gets annoying to me is when we chose our date. We wanted to make sure we had graduated but didn’t want to wait too much longer after that so we chose June 18. Well, tuns our my FCIL had chosen June and booked it the day before… Fine. We pushed it off to July to make sure there was enough space in between weddings. We then started talking to eachother on wedding plans. Colors, styles, places, etc. She decided that she was going to do Tiffany Blue. That was cool because I was doing teal. Same color family, different color. The closes color I could find to the one I really wanted at Davids Bridal was Pool. I told her about it and she agreed that it was pretty… agreed a little too much because now SHE is having the exact same color. When I got upset about it she told me that that was the color she was doing all along and had told me that. If that were the case I would have chosen a different color! So now she has taken my month and my color…. and I know it seems so simple but I don’t want my wedding to remind anybody of hers. My family will have just come from hers a month before and when they come to mine I don’t want them thinking I stole anything from her… what makes it even worse is I just found out today she stole my FLOWER TOO! I hadn’t even told her about it but my aunt was talking to my mom and found out and told her because she thought it was pretty (not knowing anything about what had already happened with the date and color) and now my FCIL suddenly has signed the contract with her florist to include that flower. Seriously? And of course she claims she has wanted it from the beginning. I am beginning to feel like I have to keep my entire wedding plans a secret so she doesn’t steal anything else! I shouldn’t have to change my plans so I don’t look like I’m the one who stole things because I have that later wedding.
Post # 3
I dont think youre being a bridezilla. I’d be pretty annoyed too.
Post # 4
As far as the “Tiffany Blue” thing goes, I was actually looking at it for my own wedding and pool is in fact the closest color David’s Bridal has to it. Actually, Tiffany blue is a very specific shade of teal, so you guys had the same color the whole time.
I’m not sure which flower you’re talking about, but most people use a small variety of flowers for weddings, so it might have been just a coincidence.
Post # 5
Just don’t tell her anymore of your ideas. You might even think about changing your colour if you really want to have more differences
Post # 6
Keep your mouth shut 😀 This will probably leave her lost and she may even come to you for help about some things. Try to keep the details to yourself, it will make it a great surprise to everyone.
Post # 7
All my wedding ideas were stolen by a friend who used them not for the wedding, but for her morning after brunch. So I know how you feel.
At the same time, you’ve got to accept that there’s nothing you can really do if she steals something except not talk about your plans with her (or give her “decoy” plans) from here on out.
Post # 8
I would be pissed and no, you certainly don’t sound like a bridezilla. Going forward share your wedding planning with no one. Which sucks, because your aunt talks to your mom……..
I think she’s insecure and trying to compete with you.
That said, check out other stores for your original teal color. Include another pop of color if you so desire…..yellow would be wonderful, I think. Mix up your flowers…there are so many lovely flowers and choices. It’s unfortunate that you are having to deal with this and that it is distracting from your job. Talk to your mom and caution her from sharing your planning ideas with aunt.
Sorry you are dealing with this……. hugz…
Post # 9
I’d be super annoyed as well…..and yes, sadly, you better keep all your wedding planning top secret or else you’re going to go crazy!
Post # 9
Just try to stay calm and relax. It’s annoying, but it happens. My cousin just got married to his fiance and the same things are happening to me. She picked the same color, a similar style dress, did her hair and makeup how I want mine etc. etc.
In the end I just chalked it up to the fact that he’s family and he picked a girl that fits in with my family…hence her similar taste. I’ve now changed my colors and I’m chainging the way I am going to do my hair.
If you’re really worried about being unique then change your colors if it’s not too late. I know for us it wasn’t a huge deal to change the colors because we had originally had a few different ideas tossed around to begin with anyway.
Whatever you do don’t be mean to her. She’s planning her big day just like you and even if it seems annoying to you she might really be harmless and oblivious to the annoyances she’s causing you. Just lift your head up high and proceed forward…don’t let this rain on your parade (it only will if you let it!).
Post # 10
I agree that the David’s Bridal pool loks a lot like Tiffany Blue. Also, maybe I’m in the minority here, I don’t think you can argue that she “stole” your month since she booked before you, and like jo.lee said, most people use a variety of flowers for their wedding. I can see how it could be annoying, but no one has exclusive rights to certain types flowers.
Maybe she is trying to take ideas from you, and maybe not — but it seems like this is may be stemming from your annoyance that they got engaged so quickly. Like other people have said, just keep planning your wedding the way you want and don’t tell anyone what you’re doing.
Post # 12
It sucks, but you can’t change what’s already done, so here are some options:
- You could proceed as planned (date, color, flowers), and live with it. But I’m pretty sure that would prolong your resentment and take away from your enjoyment of both weddings, so I don’t recommend that route.
- You could change your date. To late May or early June (heehee). Or make it even later to put more distance between the weddings. But that might not be so easy.
- Your could combine the teal with another color that will make it look very unique, like coral or pewter or red (I love teal and red!). Maybe choose a two-tone bridesmaid dress (I believe David’s offers these).
- You could change your color altogether. (This would be my choice.) It’s just a color, after all. If you like shades of blue, maybe go more towards periwinkle or royal blue. Or choose a completely different color. Then drop the hint that you’re changing your color because you’ve realized that tiffany blue is just “SO COMMON” these days and you wanted to make your wedding a little different (but don’t reveal your choice until it’s too late for her to change hers). If you browse some color inspiration boards, you are bound to fall in love with another color combination – I promise!
- Same for the flowers – there are SO MANY gorgeous flowers, it shouldn’t be hard to choose something else you love, or to come up with a unique combination that incorporates your original choice.
As for going forward, stop sharing details about your decisions with her until she has already committed to hers. It’s clear that she isn’t being considerate of you, so don’t give her another chance to cause you angst.
Enjoy, and good luck!