- 7 years ago
- Wedding: July 2011
My Fiance (officially my Fiance since 1/25/11) and I made a decision to get married in July of last year. There were many reasons why we wanted to get married but one that added to them, was my aging grandfather.
Side note: I come from a filipino family that does not share emotions and feelings. You know…you do as your told, never question your elders and respect them NO MATTER WHAT. And of course, you are always trying to get their praise somehow.
My “Papa” and I are very close and I try to visit him as often as I can. He means the world to me and was the only family member in 26 years that would actually tell me he loved me. Anyway, I’ve always wanted him to walk be down the aisle and never imagined him not being there. He turned 90 last December and and wanted to spend his last years in the Philippines. He promised he’d wait till I get married before he left, so my Fiance and I planned on July 23, 2011.
Okay so, I have to say, it’s hard being excited with wedding planning when you haven’t been proposed to yet. It just never felt like I was somebody’s “Fiance.” I told my Fiance that i didn’t care if he game me a ring or not, I just wanted him to ask me. But he insisted on “trusting him” and letting him give me a ring and propose on his own. We looked at rings last July in the LA Downtown Jewelry District and designed one together so I knew he was in the process of getting one. We chose a jewelry store with very good reviews.
Well my Papa passed away Jan 8, 2011. On Tuesday Jan 25th, my Fiance proposed to me in Disneyland! I was soooooo happy until he told me what happened with the ring…
First thing he told me was that the ring was just a “place holder” until he can get me a real one. I honestly didn’t care at that point and even told him that this ring was real enough to me. The only thing that would make that moment even better was if I could run to my Papa and show him and tell him about the proposal. But after hearing what happened with the original ring, I couldn’t help but become super sad.
Here’s the breakdown of what occurred:
July 2010- The ring was designed and drawn out.
September 2010- Fiance put the deposit down to begin the “wax ring” design. They first will design a wax form of the ring to make sure its exactly what you want then will make the real one after everything is perfect.
December 2010- Fiance was asked if the engagement was suppose to be a surprise because the jeweler lost the ring sketches and needed me to come in to draw it again.
At this point my Fiance didn’t know what to do because it was suppose to be a surprise engagement. In addition, he felt responsible for not following up enough. He also had no idea how long it took to make a ring and isn’t the type to nag or bother anybody.
He didn’t know how to tell me to come in again because at that point my Papa was in the hospital and I was at his bedside often. But he expected everything to be done before the end of 2010 at the least!
So my problem is……
1. I don’t think that the Jeweler should have accepted the deposit to begin making the ring if he didn’t even have the sketch anymore.
2. Why did the Jeweler wait almost 3 months to tell my Fiance that he needed me to come in to draw out the ring sketch again?
It hurts knowing that I could have had the chance to share my engagement with my Papa before he passed away. My Fiance wants to just take the deposit back and go somewhere else. But I think something should be said so this does not happen to anybody else. The Jewelry store guarantees 100% satisfaction.
A part of me thinks/assumes that the jeweler wasn’t treating my Fiance seriously because he looks very young and is a passive person. My Fiance is 28 y/o and works as a Computer Engineer and I’m 26 y/o and work as a Registered Nurse.
What should we do? Do i have the right to feel a little angry about the situation?