- 7 years ago
Ok ladies, my boyfriend has still not proposed even though I was anticipating it back in October and he told me then that he couldn’t afford the ring yet. Since then, according to him, every time he’s had a plan to do it, I’ve gone ballistic and made him feel like it wasn’t the right time to do it when I’m so upset.
It’s going to be June next week. That’s 8 months, girls.
It has been evident this whole time that part of the problem was that he wanted to do it somewhere special (like on a trip) and he had some sort of “plan.” So several months ago I promised myself I would be quiet until Memorial Day (the next 3 day weekend and opportunity to go somewhere)
Three weeks ago, last minute, he asked if we could go to his brother’s graduation on the East Coast (we live on the west coast). The trip cost a lot of money on both our parts which I wasn’t happy about, and it cost me four prized vacation days which I wasn’t happy about. On the trip I had a meltdown because *I* never got *my* trip, translate to, the graduation was important enough to take days off for but the proposal wasn’t???
During the meltdown he told me that he was going to ask me in two weeks. I asked if he already had that planned before the conversation. He said he did. So I calmed down and in fact we’ve actually been looking at venues, photographers and such because he wants to have a fall wedding, just 5 months away!
Two weeks will be this weekend. When he told me he was going to ask in two weeks I knew that it was because it was a 3 day weekend and he planned something.
So, it’s Wednesday and due to several different things he’s said it is clear that there is no trip of any sort this weekend. So, I tested the waters by asking if he’d like to go to Portland this weekend, figuring if he had something planned, he’d say no. Well, he agreed to go. But here’s the catchy part, he said we’d have to find someone to watch the dogs. If he planned anything we wouldn’t need a dog sitter he’d have that covered. If he had something planned, he wouldn’t be open to going to Portland.
Y’all might say what some of my friends have, which is, he’ll still ask you, he’ll just ask wherever you end up. But see, I am totally pissed off that he’ll ask “spontaneously” after all this time that he could have asked. But he never did because he had a plan and that plan involved time off from work (presumably a trip.)
So I’m really mad. I don’t know if I have a right to be. I’m upset if he asks, I’m upset if he doesn’t because of the circumstances. I can’t say anything to him because it would only make him feel like a failure and probably put the engagement off longer. If we’re getting married in November, we can’t put it off any longer, so I guess I take whatever I get… well that sucks too, right?