Am I being over sensitive???

posted 2 years ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
7243 posts
Busy Beekeeper

kitty_cupcake:  yes you are overreacting. We don’t do halloween here but from what I understand it is a pretty big event in the US. The kids probably want to trick or treat at home with their friends. They will be there for the important event the wedding. Does it suck, of course but it probably sucks for them that you planned your wedding over Halloween.

 

Post # 3
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Yes, you are overreacting. It’s not like she wants to blow off your wedding. She doesn’t want to go to brunch. No big deal, I think.

Post # 4
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

…..she’s coming for your wedding. What is there to be upset about?

Post # 5
Member
6842 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

It is kind of crappy of her, but I’d let it go. She’s going to be at your wedding; it’s not a huge deal to miss a brunch the next day IMO. It’s not worth having a big fight over.

Post # 7
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

kitty_cupcake:  OK…but she and her kids don’t want to do that. It’s not about you. You’re making this about you and your wedding when it sounds like she’s just trying to make everyone happy.

Post # 8
Member
6552 posts
Bee Keeper

Can she stay for the brunch and still get home in time? Some people don’t like to leave their own homes unattended on Halloween. The issue with not having a pool is ridiculous, but I see nothing wrong with them wanting to get home rather than trick or treat in your area. The wedding is over at that point. 

Post # 9
Member
1258 posts
Bumble bee

If your wedding is the 30th, that’s the only day you have a monopoly over. Guests and bridal party are not required to stick around for a brunch the next morning. That’s usually an optional thing, in my experience. Though it’s very nice of you to host.

Just let her do what she wants. You offered to do Halloween stuff in the area you’ll be in and she turned you down. Don’t worry about it anymore.

 

Post # 12
Hostess
9831 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

kitty_cupcake:  Honestly – part of me wishes more of our family just went on their merry way first thing morning after.  Having them stay, having to deal with them wanting to see us the next morning, making sure people got to airports late in the day etc was a nuissance and DH and I really just wanted to spend time with each other.  Our wedding was Saturday, we really didn’t get to see each other again until late Sunday night by the time the sorting people out was done.  I wish we’d said we were unavailable on Sunday.

If they don’t want to stay, let them go. 

all you can do is tell them what’s available, if they don’t like it, let them leave.

Post # 13
Member
1570 posts
Bumble bee

I know that’s not what you want, but she has other responsibilities in her life than your wedding – like her children/children’s friends and what they want to do.  They want to trick or treat in their home neighborhood with their friends.  What you want for the kids is not what they want.  They shouldn’t have to forego their plans for the day after your wedding.  They were there for the day of.   

Post # 14
Member
1272 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

kitty_cupcake:  I think the part that I’d find most annoying is that she is stressing you out about it this far in advance. There is really no reason for her to be so concerned about trick-or-treating a year out from the wedding. I’d just tell her to do whatever she wants. She will probably regret not spending a little extra time with you, but I think you’ve made some nice offers to her and her children. Maybe by next year her children won’t be so scared….and a whole year is a lot of time for her to change her mind and realize that trick-or-treating probably shouldn’t be her main worry the weekend of her sister’s wedding.

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