(Closed) am i being silly? i don’t want this party! (long – rant)

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee

You could just not attend.  It sounds weird.  If she wans to have a party and obviously has no regard for whether you want it, its obviously not in your honor.

Post # 4
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Just don’t say anything anymore.  Let them plan it, and don’t show up!!! Maybe then that will get your point across, and if they’re only doing it for a chance to get drunk with their friends, then they won’t even miss you. Then when they confront you about it, you can just say, "we told you we didn’t want this party, and since you were so pushy it was obvious you only wanted it for yourself. So we did all of us a big favor by not coming."

Post # 5
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Is a family member or close friend going to host an engagement party for you?  If so I would just let them know that one is already being hosted and then send them an invite.

Post # 6
Member
1245 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

No, your=’re not being cynical. I would hate for my engagement party to be like that. and you could be right, there may be an alterior motive.

One way to avoid it is to tell them that the two of you are really busy and don’t have time for one right now. Or that you’ve already had one and would hate to hurt the orignal host feelings.

Or come straight out and say you’re not comfortable with an engagement party that has alcohol

Post # 7
Member
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

if they’re not hearing you when you say you don’t want one, then just don’t provide them with any information (your availability, etc) to plan one. passive aggressive but maybe that will work? or the moment will pass and they won’t get around to planning it?

Post # 9
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Absolutely not. I KNOW that everyone says you should be gracious if someone is throwing you a party. I think thats bull- if you’re not close to these people, and you don’t lilke the girl (sounds like isn’t exactly a pal of yours either) I say you tell them you don’t feel comfortable with that since you are not close, and if they throw you a party you either don’t go, or you show up for a minute and leave before the debouchery begins. They dont sound like great friends anyway, so you shouldnt be afraid of hurting their feelings. I know it’s hard, but you shouldn’t be made to feel uncomfortable. Its a happy time!

Post # 10
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m SOOO glad to see all you ladies are so level headed! I agree with you all! IO know there are many who’d disagree out of “etiquette” but I think you’re completely right to feel this way!

The topic ‘am i being silly? i don’t want this party! (long – rant)’ is closed to new replies.

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