Post # 1
My dream venue just called and offered to bring their price down from 105.pp to $75. This includes 5 hour open bar, cocktail hour with 12 choices a sit down dinner with wedding cake, gratuity and tax. I thought this was excellent news but they want me to book on a Thursday. What should I do? We are only inviting our close family (only 50 people)
I ask my aunt and she said that a lot of people would have to take off two days from work and if I’m doing it to save money then I should just do it on a Saturday and have a cash bar. According to her since its close family only they don’t really care about paying for their drinks as long as they get to see us getting married =) But, I think is totally rude to invite people to a wedding and make them pay for their own drinks, our families are coming from NY, CA, Fl, VA and Uruguay. (They are already spending money on their plane tickets =(
What should I do? Get married on a Thursday and have an open bar .. even though people would have to take off Thursday and probably Friday as well.. Or should I do it on a Saturday that everyone is off from work and not have an open bar…?
Sorry is a long post… but I need help…
Thanks in advance for all your help!!
Post # 4
If you don’t want to do it on a Thursday then I think the wine & beer option is perfectly fine if you can still swing it.
Post # 5
Personally, because the wedding involves such an intimate number of people, all of whom are close, I’d say that everyone would be happy with whatever YOU choose. Your aunt says as long as they get to see you married, they wouldn’t mind paying for drinks. I think it’s safe to say that they want to see you married, and probably don’t care if it’s Saturday or Thursday.
Post # 6
I want to do it on Thursday but my aunt thinks that is tacky and once she said that .. I don’t know maybe she is right.
Post # 7
That’s a really hard decision. Are those really your only options? Would there be an in between option if you booked a Friday night or had an afternoon wedding? Could you limit the bar to beer and wine only (on either Friday or Saturday night)?
If you really have to choose, I think it would depend on how many of your guests are out of town and how important it is to have them there. If I was local, I wouldn’t have a problem with a Thursday wedding, but if I was flying, I probably just wouldn’t go.
Post # 8
I say go with what you want. Do the Thursday wedding. People that want to be there for you will make the effort to go. People coming from far away might enjoy making it a long weekend, vs rushing in Friday night/Sat morning and leaving Sunday.
Post # 9
I agree that your aunt probably is representing the views of the family. I wouldn’t say it’s “tacky” but your family would probably be happier that they get to see you get married!
Beer and wine would be fine. Also, have you checked prices for Friday or even Sunday? Sometimes those days are cheaper too. I wanted an expensive venue too and I thought there was no way we could swing it but I saved so much $ by getting my own linens, doing inexpensive favors, and non-floral centerpieces hat we are having a premium bar! (the only other option besides beer and wine, otherwise we would not be doing it)
Post # 10
I don’t think you should do it on a Thursday with so many people traveling. I would rather go to a wedding with a limited or even a cash bar on a Saturday, than try to figure out how I would attend a Thursday night wedding out of town.
Post # 11
I would ask your family/ close people you are inviting- and get a feel for what they think. In the end, do what is right for you. We are doing a Friday because our venue was FREE. (I love that word.)
Post # 12
PS- people don’t need an open bar. Just give them something to drink- and people that like drinking will go for whatever it is 🙂
Post # 13
We are having a destination wedding, and purposely chose Thursday. Everything is cheaper (including flights and hotel rooms) and we wanted to try and keep it a small wedding. We knew having it on a Thursday may pose some problems for some people, but thats ok with us. We dont want people there that arent willing to make that sacrifice, and we arent offended if they cant make it. I think with a destination wedding its important to somewhat cater to your guests, so open bar is a nice thing, though not required. Lots of people do welcome parties, and day after brunches for desination weddings, but not everyone.
Bottom line: If its better for your budget and YOU dont mind, then save yourself some money. If you are too worried about having a mid-week wedding, then save yourself the stress and stick with Saturday. Do what is right for you and your fiance. You are the ones that matter. 🙂
Post # 14
you take the best road for you and h2b. We chose a Sunday to save on costs. It’s what they are there for.
Post # 15
- Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas
Have you looked into having it on a Friday? The discounts may not be quite as good, but we still got some great deals with our venue for doing a Friday night wedding!
Post # 16
honestly i think a mid-week wedding is inconvenient but not tacky. if it makes sense for you and your partner then people will understand the same way they dress in tuxes for a black tie wedding or travel for a destination wedding. i personally think a cash bar is tacky. i would rather attend a wedding with no booze option but a lovely punch or iced tea than the option to pay for available drinks.