First some context: I am having seven BMs and 6 of them live in another city 5 hours away. So far they’ll be spending money on:
– train/plane/gas money
– bridal shower gift (FYI I didn’t want to have a bridal shower in the first place, but it was at the insistence of my mother who wanted to have a party for my aunts, older cousins and family friends. And I know it’s not proper etiquette for the mother to host it but eugh that is a whole other issue – at least my MOH is taking charge of most of it and I insisted it be very low-key.)
– bachelorette party and gift
– BM dress (I gave them a choice of dresses ranging $70-90 and I left the shoes and jewelry up to them)
– wedding gift
The bridal shower and bachelorette will at least be in their town (my old hometown) and I told them that gifts for the bridal/bach aren’t necessary, but I know that they’ll all get me something because they’re like that. I guess I feel guilty that they are spending all this money considering most are still in school/just starting out new careers/just had children.
I’ll be paying for their hair the day of the wedding and getting them BM gifts. I’m wondering how much I should spend on the gifts and if I CAN or SHOULD do anything else?
Keep in mind I am trying to be frugal too since my FI and I will be paying for the majority of the wedding so creative or DIY suggestions are welcome. I just want to show them how much I appreciate all of them being a part of my big day.
they are in your wedding party becuase they love and care about you and want to be by your side when you tie the knot. I wouldn’t expect a gift from the bride if I had been chosen to stand in the wedding party but that is just me. Paying for their hair to be done the day of seems like a good gift to me. Like I said they agreed to be in your wedding because they love you and a gift wouldn’t change that 🙂 and I’m guessing theyknkw you and your FI have to covermost of the expenses as well
I can’t give you a price range for the gifts but I can say you need to buy them gifts to thank them for their trouble and expense for your day. The best bridesmaids gifts are completely for your bridesmaids— not related in any way to your wedding. Wedding jewelry is nice, but not a gift, because they wouldn’t need that bracelet if not for your wedding.
Set out a reasonable budget based on what you can genuinely afford and how splurgy you want to be for them, and shop as if you were buying them a christmas or birthday gift.
For my bridesmaids, I gave them each some “relaxation” type gifts, not all matchy matchy but with a consistent theme: satin pajamas, a nice candle, body scrubs and sugars, and fancy teapots. Oh and chocolate! I hit a few sales and shopped well, and managed to get all that for about $60 per bridesmaid. I also covered their night in the hotel, hair and makeup, and they bought their own dresses (basic black, style of their choice).
The groomsmen each got a home-brewing kit and I think those ran about $50 each, and DH covered the suit rentals.
@VintageMichelle: I bought my girls Coach cluthes on Black Friday for a STEAL. I know they’ll all love them – and I got each girl one that I specifically thought she would like (so they all have different ones). And no one has to know what I spent. Check out CoachFactory.com if you’re interested. I can always find stuff on there to get!
I also got them jewerly for the wedding, but that doesn’t count as a gift in my book since it’s for my wedding, not just a ‘because’ gift. And I’m debating on paying for their nails to get done. We’ll see. I just doubt I’ll have the money to cover that – we’re also paying for our own wedding, which sucks. But it is what it is and they’ll love you and appreciate anything you do for them. Otherwise, they wouldn’t care to to play such an important role for your big day!
I agree with the idea of buying gifts that arent related to the wedding because honestly they wont ever wear the jewlery or whatever again. I am spending about $90/100 on each bridesmaid and I bought them their shoes. I feel like a nice thing to do that doesn’t cost money that my friend did for me is she made a card with a bunch of pictures of us and wrote a nice letter in it. It meant the most but was probably $2.
I know you’re spending a lot of money on the wedding, but you just said that they are, too. Wedding day hair isn’t a gift. If you want to get them something nice, get them something they will love and use after the wedding. If they are girly maybe do a fancy lipstick with their name engraved (I will link the video where I saw the idea below) and a cute compact from Esty. Or you could get them a nice robe and have it monogrammed.